Gossip Girl has courted outrage since its earliest episodes, and once again, right on schedule, outrage has shown up.

No doubt realizing they are being goaded (or perhaps not) the decency police haven't taken to the streets lately over Girl's debauchery. But when it comes to threesomes on the airwaves, no man is an island. According to a letter obtained by The Wrap, the decency police of the Parents Television Council have taken issue with Gossip Girl's plans to feature a teenage menage a trois in an upcoming episode. The letter, addressed to the CW network's affiliate stations reminds them they have the option to reject network programming, especially three-way-themed programming, and chillingly warns that should they carry the offending show, they will bear their share of any FCC fines that may be levied.

The letter states (their angry capitalization included):

Gossip Girl routinely depicts teenage characters engaging in promiscuous and consequence-free sexual behavior, and that's bad enough. But will you now be complicit in establishing a precedent and expectation that teenagers should engage in behaviors heretofore associated primarily with adult films? Behaviors that not only increase health risks, but which are emotionally and psychologically damaging to participants, as well? I certainly hope not, and I'm sure members of your community and parents of children who watch your network expect more of you.

May I also remind you that it is the affiliate, not the CW network, that will bear the financial burden of an FCC fine should any of the content of the November 9th episode be found to violate broadcast decency laws.

Finally, you must ask yourself, how does airing this program serve your obligation to serve the public interest? In a declaratory ruling last year, the FCC affirmed affiliates' ability to pre-empt any network programming that is "unsatisfactory or unsuitable or contrary to the public interest." The record on this is clear: contracts between networks and their affiliates may not legally prevent preemption of programming that does not meet LOCAL COMMUNITY standards.

Although the PTC has not yet seen the episode in question, they learned from an Entertainment Weekly story about the show's degenerate threesome scheming. The Wrap, however, confirmed that their fears are warrantd. Their gleeful giggling reading through the statement, CW officials confirmed, "that the Nov. 9 show will end with three characters in a tryst. Flashbacks from their menage-a-OMG will air in future episodes."

Life may well be a frolic and laughter may in fact be calling for you, but while the culture war rages on, it better be planning to keep at least six feet on floor at all times.