Angelina's secret second family: seven Muslim children, and a wife. Lady Gaga spawns jokes about old queens, Suri Cruise goes glam like never before, Tiger Woods' wife buys a mansion in Sweden. Tuesday gossip keeps coming back for more.

  • Angelina Jolie has a secret family in Jordan that she has been hiding for six years. The National Enquirer says Angie's been supporting seven orphans (three girls and four boys) at an orphanage in Amman and she considers them family. The kids "live together in one house with a surrogate mother" and Angie visits them sometimes. If this story resembles the truth even slightly, then it's definitely more like "Angelina Jolie donated a bunch of money and these seven kids won't die now, so they like her," but yada yada, let's get to the good stuff: If she has a second family in the Middle East, then surely she is cheating on Brad with... A Jordanian prince? An Arab sheikh? A Yemeni terrorist? [NatlEnq]
  • Apparently the Queen of England hosts an annual variety show, and this year Lady Gaga was a featured performer. Since it was the queen and all, Gaga chose a demure, floor-length red latex Victorian gown for when they met. Also performing was Bette Midler, who stole Gaga's lines: "I have been singing for queens my entire life. At last I'm singing in front of a real one." [Telegraph]
  • Suri Cruise has truly outdone herself, donning a bubblegum pink eyelet flamenco gown with red-and-white Minnie Mouse high heels and hoop earrings for a day in the park in Spain. [fig. 1] This child is a modern marvel. [Sun]
  • Did Tiger Woods OD? TMZ claims he was hospitalized the day after Thanksgiving, possibly for taking too much Ambien or Vicodin. Curiously, he was admitted under the alias "Will Smith." [TMZ]
  • Speaking of Tiger (and who isn't): Radar reported yesterday that Elin Nordegren walked out on Tiger. Now NYDN says she bought a mansion in Sweden. America is about to lose a ragingly hot bikini model, and it's all Tiger Woods' fault. [Radar] [NYDN]
  • Jay-Z's 40th birthday party featured "synchronized swimmers, fireworks, and an impromptu performance of 'Empire State of Mind,'" and was in the Dominican Republic, and included a surf-and-turf brunch the next day. This is how the other half lives: Categorically better than we do, even as they enter the middle age. [P6]
  • Lindsay Lohan is off to India to film a BBC documentary about impoverished children. Let's just hope she doesn't bring back an orphan. [P6]
  • Carrie Prejean was scheduled for an appearance at Foxwoods—this massive, trashy casino in Connecticut where I once spent 20 grueling minutes throwing away $100—but the time frame was after her curfew, so her mom wrote an emailing rescinding Carrie's presence based on "the hours specified": "Her reputation as a Christian is more important than any public appearance attention or monetary compensation." She added, "If in the future, you have an opportunity for her to speak to young adults, or physically challenged athletes, she would love it." I keep looking at that last part and wondering if it's a joke? [P6]
  • Dame Helen Mirren says nudity gets easier with age. "As you get older... it's more to do with the role than what men in the audience think. There's a liberation about it." [ShowBizSpy]

Figure 1.