Gov. David Paterson Spokeswoman Denies NYT Has a Resignation-Worthy Bombshell

The Business Insider posted an unconfirmed report that the New York Times' David Paterson story is so big that the New York governor will resign tomorrow. But Paterson's office is pushing back, telling Gawker "the governor is not resigning."

We asked Paterson's deputy communications director Marissa Shoenstein for a response and she emailed the following: "There is absolutely zero truth to these rumors. The governor is not resigning."

Reached by phone, Shorenstein also claimed that the story isn't coming out tomorrow or "any time soon" and called it a "profile" that's going to be running in the Metro section of the New York Times. She says more than one Times writer will be bylined on the piece and that her office has been in contact with them and the governor is cooperating. Finally, when asked whether or not anything that's going to be written in the forthcoming Times piece on Gov. Paterson could be described as scandalous, a "bombshell," or anything that might find itself in the public's general interest, Shorenstein gave a flat-out denial: "No."

This, of course, is all spin from the governor. The Times will publish when it's good and ready. And they'll have the final word. In the mean time, We left messages for NYT spokeswoman Abbe Serphos and for NYT metro editor Joe Sexton on both his home and cell phones. We'll update with their comment as soon as we hear back.

Until then, we're still left wondering: What the hell is in this thing?

Earlier, some commenters gave us some ideas.

• Runner Up: "He's not really blind."
  
  
• "Perhaps they've discovered that he has no idea how to govern."
  
  
• "I call banking kickbacks. That, or he wrote a cheque for a hooker like Jerry Springer."
  
  
• "He first became Lieutenant Governor when Eliot Spitzer hired him for sex?"
  
  
• "I'm guessing that he's a masturbator."
  
  
• "It's a hot li'l female, the Cuomo team is workin' overtime, and he will not resign."
  
  
• "He's a hardcore Warcraft player who got a little too into erotic role playing as a female blood elf mage. Expect some pretty disgusting screenshots from Goldshire."
  
  
• "He's a third-party in the John Edwards/Rielle Hunter sex tape."
  
  
• "Basically it's that he is actually a Belgian-born white dude named Tim Kimberly and he was once a paid assassin for Opus Dei."
  
  
• "Unless the "bombshell" Paterson news involves either of the two philias — pedophilia, necrophilia — or active drug-dealing to under-age children, serial murder, cannibalism, or dog fighting, I'm not going to give a shit."

And finally, our winner:

• "He's really Fred Armisen."

Wow. Just...wow. More as we get it, but in the mean time, the Paterson camp is firm in their stance of noting that there's nothing any of us should care about in this thing.

Update 1, 8:15 PM: Business Insider has now posted an update, noting a denial from Paterson's camp that matches up with what we got from Shorenstein. They've amended their headline with an asterisk, and other than coming from Paterson's "communications team" the denial's source goes otherwise unnamed.

Update 2, 10:00 PM: The Associated Press is running a story sourced via an anonymous Democrat "close to the situation" that Paterson met with Democratic leadership over the weekend, regarding his re-election plans. The source, however, notes that it was over the question of whether or not he's going to resign his office or announce that he won't be running again. This meeting has—as spun by Paterson's spokesman Richard Fife—nothing to do with rumors and/or accusations surrounding his personal life, but is instead simply part of "routine re-election campaign calls.''

Hunter Walker contributed to this report.