America's most famous teenage mother has a new commercial denouncing pre-marital sex. The message of the spot is basically, "If Sarah Palin is not your mother, don't have a baby as a teen." There's also a Levi Johnston guest spot!

The catch phrase is "pause before you play," which is obviously something that Bristol didn't do when she let some hockey playing jamoke with dreams of being famous and posing (almost) naked knock her up when she was still in high school. She shows us that she is lucky to have such a great family and so many opportunities to raise her baby, but no one else has them. So if you, average teenager, get knocked up, you are going to be alone in a room with a dowdy T-shirt, a soiled couch, and a baby that won't stop crying. So don't do it, already. We also feel bad for poor baby Tripp. All this talk about how conceiving her son was a mistake is sure going to fuck that little bundle of joy up.