Blog titan Dan Abrams and Men's Health editor Dave Zinczenko want to help out New York City by gathering all the worst media people in one place. It's a new restaurant, The Lion and it's "engineered for table-hopping." Let's explore!

According to Urban Daddy, The Lion is a "downtown social club, coyly disguised as a restaurant." It is "helmed by media heavyweights from MTV, MSNBC and Men's Health. And it will also be populated by hundreds of bright-eyed college grads, hoping to trick one of these media heavyweights into giving them a job while they're drunk. They'll probably even have a special room for it.

If you can't wait until The Lion opens—if you are too attracted by its "power-player magnetism"—Urban Daddy paints a vivid picture of the horrible fun house of New York self-importance you will encounter there:

You'll enter the Lion through the front bar, where exposed, low-wattage lightbulbs reflect the gleam of ambition in the eyes of your fellow titans of industry. Make your way to the skylit dining hall in back, where banquettes ring the walls in a formation engineered for table-hopping...

When there is not a hand left to shake, head upstairs to the balcony, where a single large table overlooks the proceedings. You just climbed the same flight of stairs that Barbra Streisand used as a stage to win her first talent competition, in 1960.

Hey, God/Allah/Yaweh/whatever? You know where to send your next E. Coli outbreak.

[via The Observer]