In your scaremongering Thursday media column: Nat Geo sells out to the Muslims, Hearst's outside-the-box new program gives employees "money," the NYT Co. expects people to pay to read the Boston Globe, and Bill Keller is a put-down artist.

  • National Geographic magazine is going to start printing an edition in Arabic. Christ, after everything else, the Muslims want to take over our national geography, too? Someone alert Texas.
  • Hey hey, Hearst is going to give "financial rewards" to employees who come up with good business ideas. The prime reward: a job. Kidding! It's probably just some pittance.
  • Here is a funny thing that NYT Co. executives said yesterday: soon, readers will be expected to pay in order to read the Boston Globe online. We wish them luck with that.
  • Ray Perelman, the 93 year-old father of billionaire Ron Perelman, has put in a $50 million bid on the bankrupt Philly papers, saying he wants to keep them in local hands. He is the Sidney Harman of Philadelphia. We wish him luck with that.
  • John Koblin wrote a little story for the NYO about Jill Abramson returning to her former role as managing editor at the NYT slightly ahead of schedule, from a different position in-house. NYT editor Bill Keller answered Koblin's questions and then added, "Boy, John, do you need to get a life. Even I can't see an interesting story in this, and I live here." What are you John Koblin some sort of MEDIA REPORTER?

[We know you were just kidding though, Bill. Do you want to go bowling? Email me.]