Mayer whispers dirty nothings into a strange female's ear. Jennifer Aniston has a 20-foot no-touch zone. Taylor Momsen is a Parisian style icon. Lindsay Lohan sips Shirley Temples. Thursday gossip is sexual napalm.

  • John Mayer's pick-up line at an Upper East Side party: "He said that she was going to make someone very happy one day, as long as she remembered to talk dirty while having sex." Ladykiller! [P6, image via Getty]
  • Lindsay Lohan is substituting Shirley Temples for alcohol. [TMZ]
  • Speaking of LiLo, the ex-husband of the fired Betty Ford Clinic employee who says Lindsay beat her up characterizes his former loved one as "a violent woman and a gold digger" and used to be addicted to crack cocaine. [Radar]
  • On the set of Wanderlust, "it was an unspoken thing that you couldn't get within 20 feet of Jennifer [Aniston]. She surrounded herself with a ring of buffers at all times." To her credit, you never know when Angelina Jolie is going to sneak up and steal the clothes right off your back. No, but seriously, is this out of the ordinary? Isn't it also an "unspoken thing" that celebrities working on movie sets would go totally insane if everyone with a random desire to reach out and touch their skirts, did so? [Us]
  • Two days after his model agency dropped her, Taylor Momsen is a Parisian fashion icon! Or, well, her ads for John Galliano perfume came out, print and music video in form. Can't hold her down. [JJ, DesignScene]

  • Michelle Williams had a Didion moment discussing the year after Heath Ledger's death: "In a strange way, I miss that year, because all those possibilities that existed then are gone. It didn't seem unlikely to me that he could walk through a door or could appear behind a bush. It was a year of very magical thinking, and in some ways I'm sad to be moving further and further away from it." I read quote while Taylor's baleful little perfume ad was still playing in the background, and felt very sad. And then ashamed for letting Momsen play for so long. [Us, Popeater]
  • Ozzy Osbourne is "getting sick of Lady Gaga." Aren't we all. [Us]
  • Diddy took his ex Kim Porter on a cruise. Nothing like a Caribbean getaway to say "Sorry for knocking up some other lady when I was with you." They hugged a lot and celebrated their twin daughters' birthday, so either they've buried the hatchet, or Diddy's going to owe current rumored girlfriend Cassie a cruise, next. [DailyMail]
  • After four years of marriage and one year of separation, Landon Donovan is filing for divorce. He's seeking spousal support actress wife Bianca Kajlich, which is somewhat surprise. I guess Americans still don't care enough about soccer to give him money? [TMZ]
  • Jennifer Aniston and Chelsea Handler "haven't officially fallen out" (how does one make that official? paperwork?) but "they certainly won't be going on vacation together for a long time unless Chelsea promises to never talk baout Angelina again." [Popeater]
  • Hulk Hogan is having "epic" back surgery. "Epic" would be a strange description for back surgery if the recipient was anyone other than human embodiment of a mid-90's Nintendo game. [E!]
  • David Schwimmer's wife Zoe Buckman is pregnant. Mazel tov! [People]