Putin Calls U.S. a 'Parasite'
Russian Prime Minister Vladimir Putin is displeased with you, America. At a youth rally (where he arm-wrestled young fans and attacked a climbing wall), he told the crowd:
"The country is living in debt. It is not living within its means, shifting the weight of responsibility on other countries and in a way acting as a parasite."
The Wall Street Journal helpfully notes that "Stalin often referred to Jews as parasites," and that under Stalin "parasitism became a crime punished by imprisonment, banishment to remote regions or death. So, no, Putin didn't mean parasite "in the good way."
He is so mad at you, America! If Putin were in charge, he would have raised the debt ceiling all by himself, shirtless. How much can the debt ceiling possibly weigh, anyway? Putin is strong enough to lift two debt ceilings.