[There was a video here]

Here's a first trailer for the big Marvel mashup The Avengers, which puts together all the superheroes you've seen at the movies in the past few years and, well, the orgy begins.

The orgy of violence, of course! And, also, it's not all the superheroes. I mean, it's not Batman or Green Lantern. Hahaha. Why would it ever be Green Lantern? Nobody likes Green Lantern. Green Lantern should just go eat worms. (Poor Green Lantern.) But it is Iron Man, Thor, Captain America, and the Hulk, all of whom have had slightly interconnected (by post-credits scenes, anyway) movies in the past three years or so. Sure, the Hulk movie had Ed Norton and here he's played by Mark Ruffalo, but still. All your friends are together! (Plus there is Scarlett Johansson as Lady Tightsuit and Jeremy Renner as The Arrowman, characters that didn't get their own movies but made appearances in others'.)

So that's fun, only it would be way more fun if they were fighting each other rather than teaming up like total gaylords to fight some Swedish guy. Yeah, the main villain in this bitch seems to be Loki from Thor, the near-androgynous slitherer played with panache by Tom Hiddleston. Everyone gets sad that he's trying (and succeeding, at least partially, from the looks of it) to blow up New York, so they say "Hey let's form a Babysitter's Club. I'm the Kristy!" Lots of tough guy banter abounds and then Scarlett Johansson shows up and says "Tits!" and all the supahheroes say "Hubba hubba..." and Thor carries her away to his thatched hut by the sea. Pretty straightforward superhero movie.

It'll likely be fun, as the Marvel movies mostly have been since they started rolling out. They're comfortably cartoony and don't take themselves too seriously, which is good when you're dealing with Norse gods and bubble-butted World War II heroes named Captain America. Plus this movie is directed by Joss motherfucking Whedon, so how could it be bad? Avenge away, party boys!