The Most Important Detail Is That The Weatherman (Allegedly) Shit His Pants
In 2010, Philadelphia weatherman John Bolaris was reportedly roofied and scammed out of $43,000 by two female Latvian escorts as part of a Miami-based crime ring organized by the Russian mob.
But the most important detail, as reported by Philly Mag, is that the weatherman (allegedly) shit his pants.
Bolaris is one of 88 witnesses in the FBI's case against sixteen individuals accused of collaborating on a scheme that used beautiful women to lure tourists and out-of-town businessmen to private clubs, then ring up thousands of dollars on the victims' credit cards (sometimes without the victims' knowledge) for caviar and bottles of champagne. (Bolaris also bought a painting off the wall of the club at the women's urging.) When victims later disputed the charges, the club owners would threaten to have them arrested, or provide the credit card companies with photos of the cardholders at the club as evidence. The women would keep 20 percent of the money they brought in, and the club managers would keep 10.
But
the most important detail
is that the weatherman allegedly shit his pants.
The Philly Post reports that one of the two Latvian women accused of conning Bolaris recently took the stand to testify on behalf of the prosecution, after accepting a plea deal.
While under cross-examination, the woman—Marina Turcina—told a lawyer for the prosecution that Bolaris was a pants-shittingly bad drinker:
"He couldn't hold his liquor. Or evidently his bowels, either."
She said the same thing in an interview with an FBI agent that occurred in August of 2011, a copy of which was obtained by the Philly Post. (The Post notes that "Rusmane" refers to another woman present for much of Bolaris' bender):
Turcina said she knew Bolaris wanted to have sex and told him "okay, if you want to have sex with both of us, then buy us the painting and black caviar."
At the end of the night, Turcina and Rusmane took Bolaris back to his hotel … While at the hotel, Rusmane sang a Russian lullaby to help Bolaris fall asleep.Later that same day, Bolaris called them. They had sent him an SMS message because they had all agreed the night before to meet again … Turcina did not remember much about the second night with Bolaris. Rusmane kept taking him to new tables showing nothing on the table and saying "look there is nothing to drink, let's order again." Turcina slept all night on the couch at Caviar Bar.
The next morning, they woke Turcina, Rusmane, and Bolaris up. They were told to take Bolaris back to his hotel, so they did. Bolaris had "shit himself" and the taxi cab driver was very upset about it and did not want to take him.
That is
the most important detail.
Bolaris declined to comment to the Post for the story (apart from noting that the women involved are "professional liars").
His agent was more vocal about the alleged shit-storm that not even his client could have forecasted would eventually brew inside his pants:
"These people are trying to discredit John, and whether or not he crapped in his pants is the least important detail, though I don't believe it's true. This is a story about people who took advantage of people. This is a story about people who stole. How does whether or not he crapped in his pants have shit to do with Shinola? For Pete's sake… Whether or not he was discreet or indiscreet that night, John put it all on the line to take on the Russian mob. If you run this story, I will find a way to look into you."
But
the most important detail
is that the weatherman allegedly shit his pants.
(He also proposed to his girlfriend live on the Howard Stern show during Hurricane Sandy.)