If I told you we listened to Beyoncé in the office this afternoon, would you accuse us of being Illuminati? What if I told you Nick Denton has a tattoo of a pyramid on his bicep and the password to get into the office is "Baphomet?" Then would you say we were Illuminati? Well, only one of those things is true.

For whatever reason, you were reading about the Illuminati a lot this week, which must mean it's a popular search on Google. Illuminati celebrity naked Kim Kardashian boobs

Happy weekend, everyone!

Check your 'tude, brah.

Subj: Check your facts

Your facts for the illuminati article were off. Citing Yahoo Answers as a scholarly website full of intellectuals is ridiculous. I would never read another article from your website again without a more thorough investigation into sources.

http://bit.ly/UjG3h6

Subj: Can u send me more information about the illuminati plz thanks

What's wrong, Riley!!!!!

Subj: That's wrong!!!!!

- Riley

Ladies, simmer down. This is a family website.

Subj: I'm done

Thanks to your new policy of blocking out a story until an ad runs, I will no longer be visiting your site and I hope other will follow! Greedy jerks!!!

Subj: Re: I'm done

Thank you for taking the time to announce your departure from our free website.
- Emma

Subj: Re: Re: I'm done

Thanks I will circulate your snotty email too. You run a free website but you do make money. Your just not satisfied with having ads at the sides that don't impend readership. Times are changing, consumers are standing up.
- Nicki

[Image by Jim Cooke]