Woman Posts Ad for Secret Yard Sale of Cheating Husband's Possessions: 'Don't Come Too Early (Like He Did)'
A Craigslist ad for a "huge ass estate sale" posted last week in the site's Vancouver-area vertical piqued the interest of locals less for the items being hawked than for the reason they were being hawked in the first place: The seller's husband was cheating on her, and she was secretly getting rid of all his stuff.
"Last minute spontaneous estate sale," read the ALL-CAPS ad. "Husband left us for a piece of trash. Selling everything while he is gone this weekend with his floozie."
While the woman may have lost her husband of ten years, she was clearly holding on to her sense of humor for dear life.
Among the items up for grabs: His favorite red leather theater seating sofas and "tools which he didn't have a clue how to use." A brand new sliding glass door "that he never got installed" also needs to go.
"I want the house empty on Monday when he returns because that will be a shock for him to see," the woman writes.
She only asks that interested parties not "come too early (like he did)," because she will be nursing a hangover after an evening of "thoroughly enjoying some wine with my girlfriends" as they set fire to the cheating husband's clothes in the driveway.
"You can see the ashes of his clothes that he is going to see for no additional charge," the scorned wife says.
A staff writer for The Province who visited the sale spoke with an estates lawyer who said the woman might not be allowed to keep the proceeds from the yard sale, as a divorce court might order her to split them with her husband.
However, the writer notes, "she'll always have the look on his face."