Hugh Jackman, walking muscle of joy, was attacked on Saturday morning by a fan while doing his morning workout in Manhattan.

Stalker Kathleen Thurston burst into Gotham Gym around 8 a.m.. Thurston, who was sobbing, threw an electric razor filled with her pubic hairs at Jackman while screaming "I love you." Jackman backed away from Thurston, believing she was withdrawing a weapon from her pants instead of the dirty electric razor. She slipped past security again, but was quickly apprehended by police a few blocks away.

The Post reports that "the NYPD Crime Scene Unit recovered the weapon and had to pick the hairs out of it to match them with her DNA."

Thurston had stalked and confronted Jackman in the past, and currently resides in a shelter for the mentally ill. Jackman told reporters that, "Here's a woman who obviously needs help so I just hope she gets the help she needs."

Extra points to The Post for their restraint on this one, as their original headline, which can still be found as part of the URL for their article, was "Hugh's Pubic Enemy."