Alex Jones Is a Tornado Truther Because, Obviously
Yesterday, we explored the wild reality of Tornado Truthers, who believe that massive storms are created by the HAARP antenna farm in Alaska (HAARP is actually a research station to communicate with aliens living underground — only fools think otherwise). Still, the whole affair was missing the input of King Nut himself, Alex Jones. Well, guess what? He's down.
"Of course there's weather weapon stuff going on — we had floods in Texas like fifteen years ago, killed thirty-something people in one night. Turned out it was the Air Force," Jones said on The Alex Jones Show yesterday.
Jones elaborated that while he's not sure that this week's tornado outbreak was caused by the government, he's absolutely sure that the government "can create and steer groups of tornadoes" (powers usually reserved not for any branch of the government, but for the X-Men).
Jones said that the smoking gun of government involvement would be if a helicopter or aircraft was spotted "in and around the clouds, spraying and doing things." He continued, "if you saw that, you better bet your bottom dollar they did this, but who knows if they did. You know, that's the thing, we don't know."
We just don't know if the tornadoes were caused by small, sentient black helicopters or a variety of atmospheric conditions. We don't know. WE'LL JUST NEVER KNOW.