William Lynch, the CEO of Barnes & Noble, resigned this week after less than two years on the job, having failed to turn around the earnings of the Last Remaining Book Store by selling color tablets. So, uh... anybody have any other ideas? For making money?

Over the past few years, B&N has watched competitors like Borders crumble and die. It's clear that the book store business is not in great health. Lynch thought he could save the company by selling Nooks, which are basically like Kindles, but unpopular. Alas, sales were disappointing. It looks like E-readers will not be the company's future. That leaves them with the following revenue streams:

1. Selling books.

2. Maybe someone will buy a lot of those "Moleskine" journals in the checkout line???

It doesn't sound too promising. Despite being virtually unchallenged in the Big Bookstore Where You Can Read Shit in the Aisles category, B&N's prospects have only grown gloomier. The book business sucks. And trying to win the bookselling battle against Amazon is not a growth strategy, any more than trying to win the tablet battle against Amazon was. The company needs something... anything... to get them back on track, and provide some hope for the future. Otherwise, they will surely fade away. And then the fucking suburbs will have even less culture than they do now.

Got any new ideas? Seriously. We're asking. I got nothing. Put yours in the comments. If you come up with a good one, you can be CEO.

[Photo: AP]