Bear Breaks Bear-Proof Glass With Huge Rock, Still Stuck in Boring Zoo
A grizzly bear at the Minnesota Zoo smashed a glass barrier with a 50-pound, “basketball-sized” rock, repeatedly slamming it against the window until one of the exhibit’s 5 layers of safety glass shattered. Because there has to be more to life than this, right?
Zookeepers thought they’d removed anything dangerous that the zoo’s three grizzlies could lift, but they apparently missed the large rock, which one zoo visitor said the bear “picked up from the bottom of the pool.” I mean, not like there’s anything else to do around here.
Keepers don’t know which of the three bears picked up the rock, but they assume it was Kenai, who has a playful, clownish personality.
“He didn’t know what he was doing. He was just being a bear,” zoo animal collections manager Tony Fisher told the Minneapolis Star-Tribune.
He was just being a curious bear who knows how to use tools and suss out the weak points of the prison that holds him. A bear who would probably get drunk, eat pizza, drive cars, and chill in a human pool given half a chance. A bear who needs stimulation.
Unfortunately, his early escape efforts attracted too much attention from authorities, who are now bolting down all the moveable objects in the exhibit and replacing the partially shattered pane of bear-proof glass.
Whatever. Kenai’s keen bear intellect is no doubt already hard at work on his next escape plan. Your layers of glass can hold his body, but they can’t hold his mind.
