The Utah Division of Motor Vehicles has denied a Vietnam War veteran a license plate he requested with the number "69," signifying the year in which he was awarded the Purple Heart, the Spectrum reports. The number has sexual connotations.

If you're looking for the devil, he's hiding in your Monster® Brand Extreme Energy Beverage, probably right between the L-carnitine and the pyridoxine hydrochloride. That's according to this respected theologian, who is crazy.

Upfronts continue! Today ABC unveiled their fall schedule which fit into the general trends of the year: investing in comedies on Tuesday and opening up Fridays for scripted fare. Even though ABC has some big shows, with legit hits Modern Family and Once Upon A Time, the buzzy Revenge, and the still strong Grey's Anatomy, they have a lot of holes to fill and are trotting out seven new shows either in the fall or a little later. Which will be winners? Which will suck worse than Work It? Let's take a gander.

You may have thought that news stories about the Pope and pedophilia were based on his shady doings when he found out that children were being abused. Get thee away devil! It was Satan's work. The pope remains blameless.