700-club

Pat Robertson Discovers Black Peoples' Secret Thanksgiving Food

Jim Newell · 11/23/11 05:07PM

On today's episode of the 700 Club, not-dead televangelist Pat Robertson was intrigued by a snippet from his co-host Kristi Watts' interview with Condoleezza Rice. Rice said her favorite Thanksgiving food is mac 'n' cheese, a sentiment that Watts seconded. So Pat Robertson hears this, notes that the two ladies' skins have similarly high melanin levels, and asks, "What is this mac 'n' cheese? Is that a black thing?" It is! It grows on trees, in Africa.

Pat Robertson Does, In Fact, Think God Cracked the Washington Monument

Jim Newell · 08/26/11 11:19AM

"Ladies and gentlemen," 700 Club televangelist Pat Robertson tells us before delivering the clip we've all been expecting for several days. "I don't want to get weird on this so please take it for what it's worth." Dude, you use disclaimers now to preface your latest comical religious explanations for natural disasters, in the case the Great D.C. Earthquake? Please show some spine to support all that bullshit, Pat.