Gwendolyn Boyd was hired this week as the new president of Alabama State University, her alma mater. She'll get a $300,000 salary, free housing, and expenses. But getting ass is out of the question.

Boar Tush, Lick Skillet, Slick Lizard, and Smut Eye. Alabama town names are pretty weird. Weirder still is that a list of them is currently one of the most-read "stories" on Alabama's news site of record. What's the weirdest-named place you ever visited? Tell us in the comments.

Semmes, Alabama, is named for a Confederate admiral. Shockingly, the people of Semmes, Alabama, felt a little weird about an "all-male, African-American gay dance team from Mobile" impersonating sexy Santa gals at their annual Christmas parade. If by weird, you mean irate.

The University of Alabama's student newspaper, The Crimson White, has apologized for running this cartoon. But why??

An Alabama woman has been charged with murdering a fellow fan because she "didn't seem upset over the Crimson Tide's loss to archrival Auburn," according to the victim's sister.

More than a dozen schools, two college campuses, and multiple businesses in Decatur, Alabama, were evacuated Thursday over a suspicious package attached to a railcar laden with toxic gas. But rather than explosives, authorities found the package held several pounds of weed.

An Alabama teenager will be tried as an adult after he allegedly stabbed his mother to death and left his father paralyzed with a punctured lung.

15-year-old Christian Adamek, a popular student at Sparkman High School in Harvest, Alabama, hanged himself Oct. 2 and died from his injuries two days later. His death came just a week after he was arrested for streaking across the Sparkman High football field during a Sept. 27 football game.

A secret society called the Machine was apparently behind the spate of free-drink-toting, limo-riding University of Alabama sorority girls who showed up to vote in the Tuscaloosa City Board of Education race last month.

Young people are bad at voting, but very good at boozing. So what's one reliable way to get them to the polls? The promise of a free drink.

Concerned that his 4-year-old son or dog might get bitten by the venomous copperhead snake living in a woodpile outside his Huntsville home, Sam Billiter grabbed his machete and headed out back to kill it.

Just when you think that the state of Alabama has taken the summer off from providing fodder for desperate bloggers, Troy University— a public university, based in Alabama— goes and announces it's opening a brand new dorm just for Christians.

A would-be contestant on America's Next Top Model has admitted to authorities in Alabama that she faked her own abduction in a poorly conceived effort to win back the affection of her estranged boyfriend.

A mystery respiratory illness has killed two people and infected five others in Alabama. All of the victims have shown signs of fever, cough and shortness of breath, but the Alabama Department of Public Health hasn't been able to identify the disease.

A series of giant explosions on two barges filled with natural gas have left three in critical condition in Mobile, Alabama. The explosions occurred adjacent to the disabled, shit-encrusted Carnival Triumph, currently being repaired in Mobile.

The Carnival cruise line disabled by a fire and left floating for days, stinking of shit and piss, has reached a new level of horror as the towline taking it to Alabama—where its passengers would, finally, be able to disembark and go home—broke, leaving them floating once more in the Gulf of Mexico, 30 miles from shore. It's been fixed, and the ship is moving again—but as these images show, it's still not pretty.

The saga of the kidnapped five-year old in Dale County, Alabama has come to a conclusion. The boy is safe and resting in a hospital and his captor, Jimmy Lee Dykes — who kidnapped the boy after shooting his bus driver dead — is dead himself following an FBI raid.

The seven-day stand-off between a survivalist and Alabama and federal authorities has come to a close. Jimmy Lee Dykes, who kidnapped a five-year-old boy in Midland City after shooting his school bus driver last week, is dead; the boy he had kidnapped is alive.

In case the news-cycle warped right past it, just a quick reminder that there is still a Vietnam vet holding a child hostage in an underground bunker in Alabama. After five days, no progress has been made towards freeing the 5-year-old, who was abducted on Tuesday afternoon.

The head football coach at Lauderdale County High School in Alabama gave a number of students a lesson in bigotry recently when he expressed his distaste for "queers" and "big fat gorilla" Michelle Obama in the same breath.