Last night, around 4 a.m., a freight train carrying screaming sirens and old dial-up modem sounds crashed through my room. It was a government-issued FLASH FLOOD WARNING, sent express delivery from the darkest depths of Hell directly to my cellphone. Was it even raining when I received the urgent message? Who knows. Will I be cranky and tired all day? Emergency Alert: Yes.

Everyone's phone just made the same noise, because, well, you know why. (Actually—make of it what you will—Gizmodo's phones made the noise a couple of minutes afterward.) So let's acknowledge the fact that everyone already knows the thing that everyone is talking about. SNOW SNOW SNOW SNOW SNOW. Sometime. There.

Iraqi authorities have rounded up 73 suspected Al-Qaida operatives in recent weeks, some of whom claim to members of cells planning Christmastime attacks in the U.S. and Europe.

A crazy man may be videotaping YOUR crotch. And putting the footage on the internet for all to see! The Post, in what is (trend alert) almost surely another story developed solely by poking around on YouTube, alerts the city to a man known only as "househead7d5." He enjoys taping men's crotches—at a phone booth, on the bus, on the subway—and posting the videos online, with clever comments like, "guy on the phone showin a little......gay sweatpants bulge phonebooth NYC," or, even creepier, "I love it when they fall asleep! not the biggest basket but he was a cutie pie nonetheless!" So who is this penis-peering multimedia madman? After the jump, we will investigate!