Not everyone can be young and good-looking and Australian and backpacking across the world at every given moment! Which is why God invented "videos," so you can watch other people do all those things—and edit them together so they look really cool—from the comfort of the desk that is slowly killing you.

Microsoft will promote Andrew Lees to senior vice president and task him with gaining a stronger foothold for Microsoft in the consumer market for mobile devices. That means taking on Apple's iPhone. According to the WSJ, Lees replaces Pieter Knook, who shuffles into retirement on today's news. Perhaps this is because Knook last year allowed Steve Ballmer to say "There's no chance that the iPhone is going to get any significant market share. No chance."