Oh my—Bill O'Reilly is angry. Angry at Newsweek specifically, for perpetrating what he sees as a "growing problem in America...media corruption." What did Newsweek do? They allowed a liberal columnist to criticize Fox News and Sarah Palin!

One of the things we've been waiting all day to see in the aftermath of the shooting today at the Holocaust Museum was how the conservatives would spin the incident. Now, thanks to Glenn Beck and Debbie Schlussel, we know.

Stephen Colbert welcomed Meghan McCain onto his show last night, where she refused to lick his face, talked endlessly about how much she loves fucking, and refused to discuss anything about Sarah Palin.

Michelle Obama was the main attraction at Time magazine's sixth annual 100 "most influential" ceremony at Lincoln Center last night. She was joined by a predictably massive group of A-listers, including Oprah, Harvey Weinstein, Mort Zuckerman, Steve Schwarzman, Jeff Bewkes, Diane Sawyer, Barbara Walters, Whoopi Goldberg, Joy Behar, Carine Roitfeld, Gayle King, Stella McCartney, Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy, Kate Hudson, Liv Tyler, Jay Leno, Lorne Michaels, Jimmy Fallon and Nancy Juvonen, Charlie Rose, David Lauren and Lauren Bush, Ann Coulter, Suze Orman, Arianna Huffington, Kate Betts, Andy Serwer, Paul Krugman, Vivi Nevo and Ziyi Zhang, Andrea Mitchell, Chris Matthews ...

• Is Lindsay Lohan heading back to rehab? That's what her mother, relatives, and friends are supposedly encouraging her to do, since she's been on a "self-destructive binge of partying, tears and breakdowns" ever since Sam Ronson broke up with her. To make matters worse, she keeps bumping into Sam everywhere she goes. Clearly, the girls need to decide once and for all which one's getting Chateau Marmont so this sort of thing stops happening. [OK!, L&S, P6]
• The Sun reports Madonna and Jesus Luz have reunited. As the story goes, Jesus came back to NYC to "perk up" Madge after all that trouble in Malawi and now they're like, going to Kabbalah classes and, like, eating dinner together and stuff. [Sun]
• Drew Barrymore and Justin Long are supposedly dating again, even though they claim they're "just friends" in public. [NYDN, P6]
• "Real Housewife" Jill Zarin recently underwent breast reduction surgery. If you're lucky, you'll see the whole procedure go down on a future episode. [P6]

Hilariously, predictably, Ann Coulter fell for the "Obama's War on Nascar" April Fool's Day story.

• Jim Cramer hits The Daily Show tonight. And in what can only be interpreted as an effort to dial down the ass-kicking headed his way, Cramer is now claiming Jon Stewart is "his idol." Good luck with that there, Jim. [HP]
• Should CNBC's Erin Burnett really be making appearances on Donald Trump's Celebrity Apprentice? Maybe not: "NBC keeps testing the limits between news and entertainment in pursuit of cross-promotional synergy." [NYT]
• "Sully" Sullenberger has scored a two-book deal worth $3 million. [TDB]
• Ann Coulter "has been especially noisy in her self-promotion lately," which may have something to do with the fact her book isn't selling. [Portfolio]
• More and more TV shows are working the recession into storylines. [ABC]
• These are dark days for the newspaper biz, as you've probably heard. [NYT]
• More on Ross Douthat, the conservative blogger who has been hired by The New York Times to take over Bill Kristol's Op-Ed column. [E&P]
• Post staffers reflect on the life and times of Braden Keil, the paper's real estate columnist who died on Tuesday and who will be very much missed. [NYO]

Meghan McCain went on Rachel Maddow's television program last night in a bid to become the Fresh New Voice of the GOP. Instead she made a fool of herself.

Meghan McCain, the famous blogger, now writes a column for Tina Brown's Like-HuffPo-But-Classy Illustrated Celebrity Internet Journal. Today she would like to write about Ms. Ann Coulter.

Which I guess makes Ann Coulter... Angela? See, here he is pointing to his Cornell Diploma in order to settle some ridiculous argument. So this is what he'll do without George Bush to kick around!

It seems someone is stalking Rush Limbaugh! Apparently Limbaugh's caretaker in Palm Beach called 911 yesterday to report that a woman had tried to sneak on to Limbaugh's property when the gates of the compound opened to let in Rush's Maybach. She's been described as white, between 30 and 40 years old, and she's reportedly driving a "new white sedan of undetermined make." Ann Coulter is a little old to match the description, yes. But Rush's new fiancée fits the bill and they do say OxyContin can impair judgment, so you may want to take that into consideration. [Page2Live]

• Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer made their first awards show appearance together at last night's Oscars, sitting just 12 seats away from Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt, although they managed to avoid a run-in by skipping the red carpet and showing up at different pre-show parties over the weekend. [People, NYDN]
• Uma Thurman, Darren Aronofsky, Rachel Weisz, Natalie Portman, and Daniel Craig all skipped out of the show early to head over to the Vanity Fair bash, where Graydon Carter invited Chesley Sullenberger and his wife Lori as surprise guests. [LAT, P6]
• Penelope Cruz and Tom Cruise had an awkward encounter at CAA head Bryan Lourd's house party on Friday night, while Oprah and Gayle King held court at Barry Diller and Diane von Furstenberg's pre-Oscars bash, and everyone "partied like it was 1999" at Harvey Weinstein's gathering. [P6, P6, Fox 411]
• At the Spirit Awards on Saturday, Mickey Rourke "playfully mauled" Rachel Weisz and "made a grab" at Jessica Alba's chest. [People, NYDN]
• A full list of Oscar winners, in case you missed the action last night. [People]

• There was no shortage of drama at the Grammys last night. Chris Brown and Rihanna were both no-shows after Brown was arrested for allegedly assaulting the R&B singer. Usher failed to appear, too, flying down to Brazil to be with his wife, who suffered complications from a plastic surgery operation. One person who did make it to the show was M.I.A., who performed on stage with Jay-Z, Lil Wayne, T.I., and Kanye West despite being nine months pregnant. [NYP, People, EW]
• Courtenay Semel says she's been cut off by her dad, former Yahoo CEO Terry Semel, and is now trying to land a reality show to pay the bills. [NYP]
• Salman Rushdie's new girlfriend is Pia Glenn, who's 29 years his junior. [R&M]
• Peaches Geldof and rocker Max Drummey are said to be divorcing after just six months of marriage. [The Sun]

Everyone's favorite scary conservative harpy may have tried to subvert democracy, twice! Property records and lawsuits show that Ann Coulter voted in Connecticut while living in New York. Now officials are investigating.

• It may be the end of the line for socialite Tinsley Mortimer and her husband Topper. The couple has been living apart since December, reportedly because Tinz is sick of Topper's "promiscuous ways." But considering this is the second time they've been married to one another, there's always the chance the third time will be the charm. [P6]
• Gwyneth Paltrow is turning into quite the entrepreneur. She's reportedly in talks to launch a chain of gyms with her personal trainer. [DS]
• Amy Winehouse says she's finally off drugs and "feels like a new woman," although she also says that she hasn't quit drinking just yet. [NYDN]
• Madonna is reportedly beefing up her security detail following death threats from Islamic fanatics. [People.co.uk]
• A rundown of the winners at last night's Golden Globes. [E!]

It's a fun new game and you can play along at home! Just place our president-elect's name in a list of names of shady characters. Then get rich on the teevee!

After all the "banning" bullshit, NBC had Ann Coulter on the Today show this morning. She is that person you didn't want to invite to the party, but did, and then wished you hadn't.

A commenter alleges that this is a photo of Ann Coulter on a flight from NYC to Florida last week, wearing a Michael Jackson-type mask and fur coat. Impossible to tell.

Skeletal oddity Ann Coulter was "BANNED BY NBC," but now she's making the rounds of the fair networks to bleat about her own victimhood:

• Madonna's interest in Alex Rodriguez appears may have waned (she's been spotted with a young Brazilian model in recent weeks), but there's another rich, older, equally Kaballah-obsessed woman happy to take her place. At a New Year's party in Parrot Cay last week, Donna Karan seemed smitten with the slugger, although A-Rod "refused Karan's advances" since he's "still hung up on Madonna." [P6]
• Not only are most people on Mustique happy the Noel family stayed off the island this year, but a bar even created a "No Noel" cocktail to celebrate. [P6]
• Lindsay Lohan says on her MySpace blog that she and Samantha Ronson have not broken up, just in case you've been up all night worrying. [People]
• Officials in the Bahamas have completed an autopsy on John Travolta's son, Jett, and claim the death was caused by a seizure. [CBS, NYP]