Stars: They're just like us! Their boyfriends have pearls in their dicks! They go grocery shopping with their boyfriends with pearls in their dicks! They visit the planetarium with their boyfriends with pearls in their dicks! They decide to try a new restaurant with their boyfriends with pearls in their dicks and when they get there the service is really terrible and they're like (kind of annoyed) "Where did you find this place?" and their boyfriends with pearls in their dicks are like "I looked it up on Yelp. It got good reviews" and then they look it up on Yelp and realize that restaurant has two locations. ! Demi Moore's new boyfriend has a pearl in his dick.

There is just something arresting about the work of Australian "Smutographer" Elivs Di Fazio. It's a pretty simple formula: hot stud, short shorts, athletic kit, some toplessness, a wacky pose, and bam, you have something I just want to look at all afternoon. Here's the rest of the shoot.

Mel Gibson just sold his $24 million mansion outside of New York, and has put his Malibu home up for sale. He's told friends he's moving back to Australia, where his screams will echo across the outback. [Daily Mail]

Here's the physical comeuppance for years of Americans obnoxiously saying "Throw another shrimp on the bahhhbie!" We had it coming. We're sorry, Australia. Now you can get back to riding your kangaroos in peace.