bans
How to Get Around Massachusetts' Anti-American Sparkler Ban
Caity Weaver · 07/02/12 03:37PMCalifornians Would Slice Their Mamas' Throats for a Bite of Foie Gras as 'Foie-mageddon' Looms
Caity Weaver · 06/28/12 09:41PMDeath To Obesity: Bloomberg Seeks to Ban Large Sugary Drinks
Neetzan Zimmerman · 05/31/12 08:10AML.A. Votes to Ban Plastic Bags, Faces Still Okay
Caity Weaver · 05/24/12 07:13PMConnecticut Prisoners Protesting 'Unfair' Porn Ban
Lauri Apple · 10/09/11 06:09PM![](http://d20hvt89h2l7r8.cloudfront.net/18k1iad1fdjgfjpg/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800.jpg)
Dissent is in the air in America! Even behind bars, the people are rising up against oppression. In Connecticut, prisoners have begun a letter-writing campaign to defend their right to own "pictorial depictions of sexual activity or nudity," otherwise known as Pornographic Magazines. Letters today! Hunger strikes tomorrow!
France Wages War on Ketchup
Leah Beckmann · 10/07/11 03:43PMFlorida Lawmaker Wants to Repeal Dwarf-Tossing Ban
Lauri Apple · 10/06/11 05:20AMMarines Ban Noisy Farts in Afghanistan
Lauri Apple · 08/23/11 10:07PMRestaurant Bans Children Under Six
Seth Abramovitch · 07/13/11 01:08AMPeople may be having fewer children than ever before, but have you noticed that the ones they are having keep gravitating directly to you — screaming through transatlantic flights, filling their diapers on crowded subways, whipping silverware at your head during romantic meals, etc.? Well, one man has, and he's decided to do something about it. McDain's, a driving range-side eatery in Pennsylvania, has instated a new policy: No more kids under six.
Penis Preservation Prevails: Ban on Male Circumcision Will Appear on San Fran Ballot
Hamilton Nolan · 05/18/11 04:11PM![](http://d20hvt89h2l7r8.cloudfront.net/18k1vqv2r4bmojpg/c_scale,fl_progressive,q_80,w_800.jpg)
Never let it be said that the persistence of a few crazy fanatics can't change the world: a proposal to ban male circumcision (for minors, only!) has officially been placed on the ballot in San Francisco. They did it, the crazy, crazy, crazy bastards! I guess when you take a step back and see the forest for the trees from 30,000 feet, the real lesson in all this is, "If you want to be assured of the right to have a doctor cut the foreskin off your baby's penis and you live in San Francisco, push that baby out before November or else go to a different city to have the baby, or else go to some back-alley circumcisionist."