Sam Horowitz actually became a man last November, but it wasn't until the Jewish mommyblog Kveller picked up his burlesque-themed Bar Mitzvah entrance video last week that the rest of the world was punched in the face with that fact.

I asked you to immortalize your most embarrassing Bar Mitzvah photos by submitting them to this contest, and the results are in. On a side note: When my Dad saw the original post he was upset because he did not like that I was joking about my special day. Let it be known that I was not making fun of my Bat Mitzvah, or the Mitzvah tradition in general. I was celebrating what is truly a very special day in the lives of Hebe boys and girls- Men and Women- everywhere.

If this experiment in traffic whoring has taught me anything, it is that it is an exercise in complete and utter humiliation in exchange for traffic. And for me, that means two little words: Bar. Mitzvah.

Blogger Gabrielle Birkner unearthed video of her 1992 Bat Mitzvah, which would be totally boring to watch—except that the DJ was a floppy-haired, pre-fame Paul Rudd, wearing a yellow tux jacket and Doc Martens.