Only a few things will make a chatty entrepreneur stop talking about their next big idea: a lawsuit, an IPO, or a magazine cover story. The last explains Facebook cofounder Chris Hughes's recent quiet period.

America is a land of hope, where you can steal, plead guilty, have your office raided by the FBI, and still get a job in the White House. Like Vivek Kundra, Obama's CIO!

Chris Hughes, the Facebook cofounder who helped Barack Obama win the election online, has landed a real job, he tells us via Twitter: He's working at General Catalyst Partners as an entrepreneur-in-residence.

In the annals of vetting, this will go down as the most laughable miss ever: Vivek Kundra, the D.C. official tapped by Obama to run government technology, pleaded guilty to a theft charge in 1997.

• The epic fallout from AIG's decision to pay out bonuses enters a second day: Andrew Cuomo says he plans to subpoena company execs, the Obama administration is scrambling to cool emotions, but clearly his influence is limited. Sen. Chuck Grassley of Iowa has suggested that AIG execs follow a "Japanese model" and choose between "apology or suicide." [NYT, ABC, WSJ]
• Given the new restrictions on Wall Street bonuses, banks are now looking for loopholes and planning to boost base salaries to offset lower bonuses. [WSJ]
• Goldman Sachs is bailing out its own employees: It's offering to lend money to more than 1,000 employees who've been squeezed by the crisis. [NYT]
• Mortgage fraud is at an all-time high, but you probably figured that. [CNN]
• Unsurprisingly, banks are raising interest rates and cutting credit lines. [BN]
• Housing starts surged in February from a record low the month before. [BN]

In 1932, an aristocratic, white, crippled version of Barack Obama was elected president, and the Republican Party watched in horror as he eased a weary nation into the warm embrace of European socialism.

Can you destroy — or cement — your professional reputation in 140 characters or less? On Twitter, it's easy! Watch and learn from ABC's Jake Tapper, ex-Wonkette Ana Marie Cox, VentureBeat's Eric Eldon and others:

Andrew Cuomo is demanding answers. President Obama said today that he "choked up with anger" when he heard the news. The news media is up in arms. And now the Treasury Department says it plans to do whatever it can to block as much as $30 billion in government aid if AIG doesn't revert course and cancel the $165 million in bonus payments that it says it is compelled to hand out to company execs. Why in the world is AIG going ahead with the plan when doing so pretty much guarantees its reputation will end up ranking up there with Enron and Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities?

• Yet one more newspaper is folding. Hearst's Seattle Post-Intelligencer will shut down its print operations tomorrow, but its website will live on. [Seattle PI]
• The Sci Fi Channel is changing its name. To Syfy. This is not a joke. [NYT]
• CNN says it plans to "devote the bulk of its news effort this week" to covering the global financial meltdown. How timely! [NYT]
• Are CNN anchors Kyra Phillips and John Roberts secretly dating? [NYM]
• Book sales in the U.S. are down slightly, but they're up in Europe. [NYT]
• Andy Samberg will host the 2009 MTV Movie Awards. [THR]
• Barack Obama will appear on The Tonight Show on Thursday. [The Caucus]
• More on last week's management shakeup at Fox. [Variety]
• Sopranos creator David Chase is back at HBO with a new mini-series. [AB]
• Race to Witch Mountain was No. 1 at the box office this weekend. [AP]

How on earth did so many investors fall victim to Bernie Madoff's Ponzi scheme? If they'd only bothered to consult a "face reading expert," they would have known instantly he was up to no good! At least that's what Jean Haner, who was asked by the Daily News to read the fraudster's mug, says. The author of the book The Wisdom of Your Face, Haner says that while Bernie's face might suggest "I care about you—and your money," that's just what he used to gain the trust of his victims. If you look more closely, you'll see that his eyes are "deep-set" and "slant down," which are clearly indicative of someone who is pessimistic and prone to do dishonest things: "When the going gets tough, rather than be honest, he'll keep secrets." Now you tell us!

Confused, misdirected populist rage threatens Obama from all sides! And there's really nothing he can do! Well, there's one thing he could do.

• Is AIG officially the most despised company in America? Following the disclosure over the weekend that execs planned to go ahead with $165 million in bonuses to top execs comes word that a good deal of the billions in bailout money it received went to banks like Goldman Sachs ($12.9 billion), Merrill Lynch ($6.8 billion), and Bank of America ($5.2 billion). [BN, NYT, WSJ]
• Larry Summers: "There are a lot of terrible things that have happened in the last 18 months, but what's happened at AIG is the most outrageous." [BN]
• UBS plans to cut another 5,000 jobs. [Reuters]

Europeans just love Barack Obama, since he's not constantly calling them names and touching them inappropriately like his predecessor. So the Germans named some terrible fried chicken product after him, as an homage.

Obama has done pretty well by his logos. Pepsi loves them. People love them. But there's a dark past behind his latest logo, TIGER (Transportation Investment Generating Economic Recovery), and it involves Hitler.

Oh some casino called, quote, "Indiana Live!" thought it would be so cool to have an ad with a fake Barack shilling for their casino, called, again, "Indiana Live!" It was not cool with Barack.

• Why, yes, of course there's a shawarma lunch cart in Midtown named after Barack Obama. [ML]
• The good news/bad news about Minetta Tavern. [Eater]
• A roundup of restaurants slated to open next week. [TONY]
• The Four Seasons Hotel is opening a "caviar lounge" on March 23. Genius. That's totally what NYC needs. [GS]
• Padma Laskshmi supposedly flipped out when she and elderly boyf Teddy Forstmann were forced to wait for a table at Schiller's last night. [Gawker]
• Most BYOB restaurants are breaking the law, it turns out. Also? Stretch limos that serve booze are in violation, too. Please take note, Mineola. [Crains]

Vivek Kundra, the White House's chief information officer, has been placed on leave after Yusuf Acar, a technology manager in the D.C. government who previously worked for Kundra, was arrested on bribery charges.

The moment Aretha Franklin stepped out at the Obamanaugural, people went nuts over the structured beret with large bow" she wore. Now Luke Song, Franklin's longtime Detroit milliner, is getting actual orders for actual hats!

Washington has three sad "social" magazines: Washington Life, Modern Luxury's DC, and Jason Binn's Capitol File. We can't believe all three are still publishing. And Obama had them all over for tea!

FBI agents have raided the former office of Vivek Kundra, a D.C. official tapped to be Barack Obama's chief information officer. A Kundra lieutenant has been arrested on bribery charges. But Kundra's clear, we think!