Stephanie Pratt, sister to creepy blondebeard Spencer, got DUI'd. Roman Polanski got out of jail! Kinda. Mickey Rourke, mobster groupie? Penn Badgley should huff paint. Pam Anderson's big train and Tommy Lee's big wang. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup!

Michael Lohan's worried about his daughter, might be right. Situation: critical. Robert Pattenson's mom hates you. Who sucks more? Jon Gosselin or TLC? Tina Fey's virginity, Madonna's neighbor relations, Karadshian Ass..ian...and much much more. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

[Mary-Kate Olsen, her boyfriend Nate Lowman, and his hat try to find barbershop quartet rehearsal in Paris on Saturday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

Jon and Kate Gosselin completely suck at life. Michael Jackson was weird on The Simpsons. Weird! Weirdos will get off on Marge Simpson in Playboy. Carrey Mulligan? Emmy Rossum! Pervy Dr. Phil, many more. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

[Sean Lennon escorts his corpse bride Charlotte Kemp Muhl to the Hermes show in Paris yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[On the set of Wall Street 2 in Central Park yesterday, Old Grandpa Oliver Stone leans in to tell Shia LaBeouf and Michael Douglas that in his day, they walked to school with no shoes. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Jessica Szohr recycles an old line today on the set of Gossip Girl when a crew member measures himself awkwardly. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Chace Crawford is ashamed after confusing an ice cream truck with his ride to school. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Taylor Momsen gives the camera a scowl when someone tells her she needs to flip her script on the set of Gossip Girl yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Kurt Russell puts Goldie Hawn in a bad humor at a gas station in California yesterday when they didn't have her favorite frozen treat. They got Combos instead. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Hugh Jackman considers gender reassignment surgery while checking out his enormous orange rack during a pumpkin shopping spree with his family in Connecticut yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Peaches Geldof walks the line between being a chic socialite taking home armfuls of fashion swag and a bag lady when leaving Milan today. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Ben Affleck takes a swing at an unoriginal extra while filming outside of Fenway Park in Boston yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Sharp-dressed man Hugh Jackman gives his daughter a push at a park in the West Village yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Lady Gaga hides her imaginary penis with some flowers outside her Paris hotel. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Lily Allen shows some wide-eyed excitement while picking up some munchies at a London supermarket yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Courtney Love takes a little nibble while walking down the sidewalk in Manhattan yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Renee Zellweger looks for some help in the beauty aisle at Pavillions grocery store in L.A. yesterday. Image via Bauer-Griffin]

[Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie go to a foreign country and scoop up some baby gerbils while in France last week. Photo via Bauer-Griffin]

[Jude Law makes a face every male knows well on his way out of the Windham Theater in London last night. Image via Bauer-Griffin]