Peggy Noonan’s body may be in Manhattan, and her soul may be in Ronald Reagan’s coffin—but her mind, now and forever, is in Brooklyn, at a street fair she went to a few years back.
Are you having the loudest sex in New York? Do you live in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn?
Richard Martin, the crazy sign-posting super in Bay Ridge who enjoys insulting tenants and watching his little dog ride the mechanical pony, is back in his proper place: the newspaper. The Daily News, determined to win the Martin-related tabloid war, reports today that the crazy old coot has finally moved the garbage cans out of his lobby, where he had placed them to piss off his tenants. He clarifies that those tenants are still, however, "disgusting slobs." But one anonymous tenant has struck back by lighting one of Martin's crazy signs on fire "and scorching the wall behind it." War! Could this be the end for our hero's reign of textual terror? Heaven forbid. In remembrance, a photo of our all time favorite Richard Martin sign [via BeehiveHairdresser] after the jump. We call it "Irish Fucking Christmas."
A blogger (inherently untrustworthy) alleges that he saw Richard Martin, the crazy old sign-posting, doggie horse-riding super of Bay Ridge, littering in the subway! Which would be ironic, considering Martin rants at his own tenants for their littering sins. Even worse, the witness says he saw Martin littering right in front of an MTA worker who was sweeping up trash. Hard to believe such a man would do something so callous and unfeeling. To be fair, this really could have been any old guy in a Korean War Veterans' hat. We must protect this mean old coot's reputation! [lines in the street]
Richard Martin, the crazy old Bay Ridge building manager whose penchant for leaving psychotic, insulting signs all over his front door has turned him into a New York tabloid sensation and, consequently, media critic, has finally been captured on film in his natural habitat enjoying his favorite activity: helping his tiny dog ride the mechanical horse. A complicated man, Richard Martin is. Click to enlarge this picture of a lifetime. [Bay Ridge Rover via BeehiveHairdresser]
Richard Martin, the crazy old super in Bay Ridge who enjoys posting abusive signs about his tenants and filling his lobby with garbage to teach them all a lesson, is now aiming his strongly worded sign-based commentary at the free press. The newly minted media critic has taken aim at Daily News reporter Matthew Hysiak, whom Martin accuses of being "shit" for misquoting him in an article. Already, Martin has achieved a more insightful level of press criticism than Howard Kurtz. In further news, somebody has stolen Martin's umbrella! Did he post a sign about it? You bet! Photos of his news critique and his arch rejoinder to the umbrella thief [via BeehiveHairdresser], after the jump.
The tabloid frenzy over Richard Martin, the crazy old Bay Ridge super who enjoys posting crazy signs insulting his tenants, continues to escalate. The Daily News gains the edge today by breaking the story that the cranky old man is letting his building's lobby fill up with garbage. To teach those dirty tenants! The city's other media outlets are surely deploying crack investigative teams to Bay Ridge at this very moment, intent on uncovering all the serpentine twists and turns of this developing, inconsequential matter. After the jump, an actual photo of the abrasive sign that the coot posted warning his tenants of his rotten scheme.
Yesterday we noted the death of Paul Mento, whose body was found gagged with duct tape in a bathtub at Bay Ridge's Best Western Gregory Hotel, site of another recent murder. We also mocked the fact that police were "investigating the death as suspicious." No shit, right? Well, it turns out that Mento's death was in fact a suicide. And that's not all—he was a former executive with the AP.
The Best Western Gregory Hotel in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn offers high speed internet access, spacious meeting rooms, and free continental breakfast. Also offered: Murder! Yesterday the body of a 52-year-old man was found in the bathtub at the hotel, with his mouth gagged with duct tape. "The police said they were investigating the death as suspicious." Well, they know better than me, I guess. But hey, it's the same hotel where a 26-year-old man was stabbed to death in December by his lady friend after sex got too rough. Sounds like the lesson is, don't stay here if you are into kinky sex and your age is any multiple of the number 26. Or, more likely, the killers were looking for the guy (from, predictably, New England) who wrote this incredibly entitled yet asinine online review of—we remind you—a Best Western in Brooklyn:
While media watchers speculated about the backstory over the Times' John McCain article, another journalistic tug-of-war was underway; this one over Richard Martin [photo via NYP], a crazy old coot handyman in Bay Ridge who leaves crazy, rude, threatening notes for his tenants. The blogs have been laughing at Martin for a while now, but today both the Post and the Daily News have stories about the man. For no apparent reason. It's a full-fledged tabloid war! What's the backstory here? We won't rest until we figure it out. [UPDATE: Could this link in an NYT blog have been the spark? Also, much more info and pictures of Martin's work here]. Below, two of Martin's helpful notes to his tenants—keep in mind his explanation that "They're Arabs, they don't give a fuck."
Bay Ridge smells like shit. Ever since a mysterious $6.9 million sewer project was completed in 2006, "a stretch of Fort Hamilton Parkway between Marine Ave. and 99th St." has been blanketed with the unmistakable stench of human waste, according to the Daily News. Which has Bay Ridge's old and cranky residents upset!
If you were in any part of Manhattan or, really, the world yesterday, you probably had some sort of encounter with the rainbow-colored vomit puddles of the Gay Pride parade. A dude named Brad from Bay Ridge was so inconvenienced by this event that he took to his keyboard, decrying the gays and their filthy, bus-delaying ways. We couldn't help but kind of see his point (sic throughout, obvs). "So today i had some errands to run in the city," he begins. " I hop on the bus as usual and expect to be in the lower east side within a half hour. Not today. Today turned out to be the gay pride parade. can someone explain to me how you can shut down half of the biggest city in this nation for a parade to celebrate being gay ? new york city is composed of nearly 6 million people over half of them being women. THE WOMEN OF NYC have been sucking dick for FARRRR longer than any gay man. If anyone should be celebrated and thanked for there efforts it is these woman." We like where you're going with this!
