When famed broadcaster Alistair Cooke (of Masterpiece Theatre fame) died in 2004, his family wanted to respect his wishes and scatter his ashes in Central Park. Since disposing of human cremains on park property is frowned upon by authorities, the family smuggled his ashes into the park in a Starbucks cup (we're assuming venti) and did the deed. That would be creepy enough, were it not for further revelations that, pre-cremation, Cooke's leg bones had been sawed off for sale by an illicit body-part retail ring run by "ex-dentist" Michael Mastromarino. According to the Daily News, owners of the New York Mortuary Service — one of Mastromarino's sources for people pieces — are taking a prosecution deal to detail the dismemberment and sale of "hundreds" of corpses. Regarding Cooke, the NYDN notes with characteristic restraint that "his cancer-ravaged bones were sold for more than $7,000." That's nasty, but at least his parts weren't used to beef up someone's insufficient pecker.

We were mildly interested in the Sun's article on the new BBC morning-news show designed for U.S. viewers, even though we were also confused about why any of the paper's readers would care about it. (The show, according to the article, will be carried not on Time Warner Cable but on Cablevision, which serves only the Bronx and eastern Brooklyn, and neither known for their large populations of stinking rich neocon Likudniks.) But we were also stopped short by the piece's lead, which focused on the broadcast's London-based anchor:

In a disappointing little update to the "BBC mistakes cabbie for IT expert" story, it's come out that the bewildered man mistaken for IT expert Guy Kewney — and then mistakenly interviewed on live TV — is IT expert Guy Goma. According to Kewney, Goma is not a cabbie but a business studies grad who was at the Beeb applying for a high-level IT job.

In case you didn't see the video this weekend: A cabbie being mistaken for an IT journalist in the wake of the Apple vs. Apple decision. Here, the BBC interviews an unwitting taxi driver, thinking he's tech expert Guy Kewney. The cabbie gives one look of shock ("face of horror" on the transcript) and then decides to fake it.

Oh BBC, aren't you above this sort of thing? Not just running a four-year-late trend story on blogs' influence — "The impact of blogging has reached a tipping point, argues Julian Smith, senior analyst at Jupiter Research" — but tying it to the recent We Media conference.

Are we back to sniping Bill Gates with press photos again? Through his career at Microsoft, coverage of Gates moved from "Nerdy young Gates" to "Lurking evil Gates," softening to "Old and feeble Gates," before honoring him as "Wise and wizened elder statesman Gates." But with one little defeat for Microsoft in Europe, the BBC picks its favorite AFP photo: "Shrieking crypt-keeper Gates."

The BBC is so witty, the writers coordinate gotchas with the photo captioners.

A TV-reporter pal forwarded along a BBC America press release late yesterday that may well have scared off us away from the whole email thing for a while. We have no idea what they're pitching, and we have no idea how they're trying to pitch it. But when this photo ("It came up, unbidden, in my inbox," said our friend. "I didn't look away quickly enough.") is what we're opening with, well, we're very pleased to be oblivious.

It's not, sadly, as cool as you think.

The BBC, ladies and gentlemen. That totally helps us understand this whole bird flu thing.

This is bad:

The BBC's J-Lo documentary, "Behind the Behind," airs tonight. "It reveals how she really grew up in a posh New York suburb and went to private school." Also: E! "True Hollywood Stories" is airing a special about the Hilton sisters on Sunday at 9PM.
Behind the behind [BBC]
Up next: the Hilton sisters [EOnline]

It's possible, if not to avoid the war, at least to avoid the cable news networks, which are stuck in an infinite loop. Basra is always on the point of surrender, the pictures of the same grainy square of desert, and the commentators never know what they're talking about. There is an antidote.
· Command Post [minute-by-minute links to news as it breaks around the web, and summaries of the main cable news]
· Agonist [as above, though the guy takes time off to sleep]
· Instapundit [Glenn Reynolds is being out-posted, but he injects more attitude, and Instapundit is the place to go if you hate Chirac more than Saddam.]
· Reporters' log [raw posts from BBC journalists]
· BBC News [best online news site]
· MSNBC [best US cable news website]
· Where is Raed? [blogger in Baghdad]

The BBC reports that US networks are considering bringing the popular UK TV series "The Office""a mock fly-on-the-wall documentary about a stationery supplies office" to American audiences. The San Francisco Chronicle's reviewer, Tim Goodman, says American audiences "might not get it because of the subtleties. We like the sledgehammer stuff." Speak for yourself, Tim. Sledgehammer stuff is why network TV sucks.
US critics warm to The Office [BBC]

If you missed the BBC story a few months ago, The Morning News reviews Brock Enright's New York kidnapping business. New York not exciting enough for you? For a price, Enright and his cohorts will stage your kidnapping, customized per your requests. It's like having your own personal FARC! After all, who doesn't enjoy a good kidnapping once in while?
Designer kidnappings [TMN]
Kidnapping for kicks in New York [BBC]
Brock Enright

Check out BBC coverage of New York, from Matt Wells....

I was wondering why the BBC was showing up in the refer logs. This is a group weblog, in video...