On Sunday, Beijing police said that they had arrested the couple captured in a sex tape apparently filmed at China’s flagship Uniqlo store, the Los Angeles Times reports. Four other people have also been arrested.

Did you recently film yourself fucking inside a fitting room in the Bejing Uniqlo store, then upload the video to the internet? Congrats: you look like you’re having a lot of fun. Also, your entire country—including the government—is watching.

Protests that began peacefully late Friday night in the semiautonomous city of Hong Kong escalated on Sunday when riot police fired tear gas into the sitting crowds in an attempt to clear protestors from the government center.

An independent film festival in Beijing that had been running since 2006 was forced into cancellation by the Chinese government Friday in an alleged attempt to monitor ideological freedom.

He would have been my first, I suppose—a Korean student at some other school in Beijing's Wudaokou university district.

[Michelle Obama plays table tennis at the Beijing Normal School on Friday.Image via Andy Wong/AP.]

At the end of this month, four major baby trafficking rings were busted by authorities in Beijing and Jiangsu, rescuing 382 babies and arresting 1,094 people involved.

Sky News correspondent Mark Stone was detained by Chinese police in Beijing this morning while in the middle of a live segment on the anniversary of the Tiananmen Square massacre. Most of the episode—include the moment they were detained, and Stone's conversations with one officer in the midst of their detention—was captured by Sky's camera operator and broadcast live to viewers of the English cable channel. (The entire incident was also captured by another police officer, who filmed the incident on a portable camera.) Stone says that they were detained for saying an unspecified word ("protest"? "Massacre"?) during the report; the English-speaking cop with whom he talks says they were stopped from filming because they didn't have the right permits. [TV Newser]

Chinese flies looking to build a beautiful life for themselves in the public toilets of Beijing were dealt a crushing blow earlier this week, after government officials rolled out a new set of sanitation guidelines including a "two fly-maximum" rule for restrooms.

Joe Biden is currently touring China, where his speeches are so long and boring, they are literally inciting violence. Or, so says the Chinese government, which has been trying to shove reporters out the door every time Biden calls for "openness and candor" in Chinese-American relations:

This week the Chinese are celebrating their Communist Party's 90th by buying it a sentimental birthday card, taking it out to Shoney's for the breakfast buffet, then swinging by J.C. Penney to get it a nice new cardigan sweater and some comfortable slippers.

A "near-riot" broke out in the crowd at a Beijing Apple store on Saturday, a day after the iPad 2 went on sale, sending four to the hospital and smashing a glass door.

Now that Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has overthrown the internet and been named Time's "Person of the Year" is there anything left for him to do? Yes: Conquer China, beginning with this weekend's visit to Beijing.

[Flawless Secretary of State Hillary Clinton inadvertently intercepts Treasury Secretary Tim Geithner and Chinese Vice Premier Wang Qishan when they try to shake hands today in Beijing. Image via Getty]

[Tourists in Tiananmen Square in Beijing enjoy the decorations for National Day to commemorate the 60th anniversary of the People's Republic of China and intimidate us Americans. But, ooh, pretty pictures! Image via Getty]

Whenever real-estate bubbles pop, the words of Percy Bysshe Shelley are trotted out by lit-major columnists. Before it gets too hackneyed, here is the text of "Ozymandias" with images of Dubai and other former boomtowns.

Oh my, Michael Phelps, what have we here? I am guessing it was a local purchase? Perhaps from a small boutique in one of those labyrinthine Chinese megamalls that you could never actually find again in the case you discovered their elaborate certification that you were buying a genuine limited-edition Bathing Ape was a forgery? Here is a hint: Bathing Ape doesn't manufacture hoodies with short sleeves! I don't think so anyway. No one should! But also: I know you are down with G-Unit or whatever but you are a vaguely dorky-looking 6'5 white swimmer. The "whimsical self-mocking hip-hop internationalist" aesthetic was not meant for you. Your shorter whimsical less-white friend knows this. Call us when you win some gold medals that look as as cool as Mark Spitz's! [Guest of a Guest] Wholly unrelated: Just Asking: Is Michael Phelps A Douche? [Bestweekever]

They were the Olympic opening ceremonies that wowed the world with their stunning displays of Socialist sophistication— but were they on the level? Allegations are flying that Chinese authorities faked certain parts of the broadcast, even going so far as to replace a singing 7-year-old who organizers deemed not hot enough to serve as the face of young China. Says HuffPo of the last-minute switch:

The Beijing Olympics got off to a rough start as a crazed attacker assailed two American tourists and a Chinese tour guide with a knife this morning, killing a man and wounding two women. The murder victim was a relative of the U.S. men's volleyball coach. The assailant committed suicide after the attack, according to authorities, throwing himself off the 45-meter Drum Tower. U.S. softball player Laura Berg and USOC spokesman respond to the tragedy after the jump.

It goes without saying that we will not be in Beijing to cover the Olympics. Furthermore, we've never been to Beijing, and our Olympic experience is limited to one pair of first-round tickets to see the Dream Team crush Kyrgyzstan or somebody in Atlanta in 1996. None of this precludes us from rounding up all of the information on the Internet in order to tell the media that actually is covering the Olympics in Beijing how to do its job. So listen up! Don't be just another sap writing about Michael Phelps while being beaten by Chinese police. After the jump, the only guide to covering the wondrous 2008 Olympics you will ever need: