Bill Murray, who became a plaid-knickered folk hero to drunken, globe-hopping duffers everywhere after being pulled over by the killjoy Swedish police on suspicion of silently whirring down the streets of Stockholm in a borrowed golf cart while under the influence of too many vodka-infused Arnold Palmers, has finally answered for the antics that briefly rocked the world of Scandinavian law enforcement two weeks ago. Explains Murray about the post-party shuttle service he offered to some fellow revelers:

While we've always envisioned Sweden as an idyllic place where American actors can go to play a few rounds of golf, throw back some cocktails at the 19th Hole, and then take a leisurely, low-speed joyride through the city without being hassled by The Människa, the news that Bill Murray was pulled over in downtown Stockholm on Sunday for suspicion of drunken golf-cart driving has shattered our cherished illusions about the permissiveness of the Scandinavian nation. A spokesman for the Swedish fuzz remarked on Murray's refusal to take a Breathalyzer and about the unknown origin of his slow-moving electric vehicle:

Bill Murray refuses breathalyzer after tearing through Stockholm in a golf cart. [Guardian]

· Though pretty straightforward, this video's title, Drunk Bill Murray Almost Fights a Guy, still oversells things a bit: The video's so shaky that it's hard to tell if that's actually Murray, what his level of intoxication might be, or how close to fisticuffs the New Orleans encounter came. Still: Blurry video of a famous guy doing stuff! Probably! That's gotta be worth 41 seconds of your time.
·Brett Ratner's reveals his simple, yet effective, strategy for dealing with paparazzi who want to take pictures of the chicks he's nailing: payoffs.
· We don't care what that e-mail says, we still think that's Zach Gailifianakis in the Comcast "Spider-Man-Obsessed Roommate" commercial.
· Hey, unicorns!

It seems the golf course in St. Andrews, Scotland, is turning into an unlikely Booty Central for older male actors with thinning hair. First, Kevin Costner took his wife to the Old Course Hotel on their honeymoon and wound up being accused of soliciting some slap-and-tickle from a masseuse; now, The Sunday Telegraph — well on top of what may become known as the "In The Hole!" beat — reports that Bill Murray, ganking a move from his Lost In Translation alter ego, met 22-year old Lykke Stavnef at a bar and accompanied the Scandinavian lass to a party overflowing with nubile young blondes. But that's where the similarities with the film end, unless Sofia Coppola cut out the stirring, emotionally pivotal scene where Murray gazes deeply into Johansson's eyes and then tenderly plunges his hands elbow-deep into her wet, long-ignored sink:

Defamer is committed to providing our readers with up-to-the-minute information about any changes to the release schedules of the summer's hottest blockbusters, especially when those blockbusters feature the wisecracking, lasagna-lovingest feline to ever creep across the big screen on little CGI cat feet.

· Does beating your already "lowered expectations" constitute "good news"? If you're DreamWorks Animation and the news doesn't involve losing more money (here, it's Madagascar products helping the bottom line), it's good enough. [Variety]
· Bad contract or house payment due? Bill Murray is in negotiations to once again voice the world's favorite lasagna-gulping cat in Garfield 2. [THR]
· Chinese authorities relent and will let Desperate Housewives through its Great Wall of Programming, insuring that the world's most populous nation will think that all Americans are horny soap-opera actors with nicely manicured front lawns. [Variety]
· David E. Kelley generates buzz at NBC by giving morning talk shows the Ally McBeal treatment. Not so long ago, the performance of his The Law Firm reality series generated so much buzz that they had to demote it to Bravo. [THR]
· Westworld, the sci-fi remake put on hold when attached star Arnold Scwhwzenegger quite inconveniently was elected governor of California, is once again "a go." And should he or the people decide that he's a crappy politician, Arnold may use it as a comeback vehicle. [Variety]
· MTV refuses to let Wilmer Valderrama slip away into total obscurity, greenlights his "yo mama" joke competition show. Sometimes we're so happy that we've passed out of their target audience. [THR]

• At the after-party for the premiere of Broken Flowers, star Bill Murray jumped over a table and chased down an Interview photographer for taking his picture. Sadly, the party was sponsored by that very magazine, but you try telling that to a crazy man. [R&M]
• Apparently, Murray's mood was not aided by Mercedes, which sent out luxury cars to chauffeur certain luminaries to the event. While Bill Murray and Jim Jarmusch were carted about in a Maybach 62, poor Sofia Coppola and Taye Diggs were forced to ride in a ghetto Mercedes R-class. Bill Murray hates this sort of injustice, we're sure. [Page Six]
• Johnny Knoxville stays true to form, kicking the ass of some striped button-down wearing frat boy who wouldn't leave Kate Moss alone at a Soho bar. Such a gent, defending the honor of his former mistress. [Lowdown (2nd item)]
• OMG, Roger Friedman is still writing about Michael Jackson. The mind boggles. [Fox411]

· Martin Sheen raged against the Warner Brothers PR machine at an international press junket last Tuesday, giving a "very passionate speech about how the p.r. man should not dictate what questions the journalists were allowed to ask, what he was allowed to discuss, and how this was a good example of why he felt the need to speak his mind." [Page Six]
· Stephen Sondheim is (inexplicably) doing a musical version of Bill Murray's Groundhog Day. [Page Six]
· Rapper 50 Cent bought his six-year-old son a kiddie-sized tailor-made bulletproof vest. [Page Six]
· Antonio Banderas on LA: "I don't like living in California. I like Spain. People in Los Angeles are fake." [Cindy Adams]
· Liz Smith points out that Brian Tolle and Brian Clynecreators of the critically acclaimed Irish Hunger Memorial in Battery Park Citywill not be allowed to march in the St. Patrick's Day Parade because they are gay. [Liz Smith]
· Security guards at the Jean Paul Gautier show covered PETA protesters in fur coats as they hauled them away. [NY Daily News]