Big Rob—the leviathan security detail who rose to national prominence hurtling away Britney Spears's paparazzi tormentors with one swat of his canoe-sized arms—has started a blog. Now employed by the fraternal order of avant-garde multi-instrumentalists more commonly known as the Jonas Brothers, Big Rob has been promoted from his overzealous-teenbopper-pummeling duties to become an actual member of the band. But let's let Rob explain, directly from his blog's home at RyanSeacrest.com—your full-service online source for all the completely stupid things Ryan Seacrest cares about it, apparently!