Ed Norton is celebrating his 40th birthday today. Saturday Night Live's Andy Samberg is turning 31. Robert Redford is 73. Patrick Swayze is turning 57. Comedian Denis Leary is 52. Christian Slater is turning 40. Nadine Strossen, the president of the ACLU, turns 59. Newsman Bob Woodruff is turning 48. Former First Lady Rosalynn Carter turns 82 today. Jeremy Shockey of the New Orleans Saints is turning 29. Director Roman Polanski is 76. Actor Craig Bierko is turning 45. And Frances Bean Cobain, the daughter of Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, turns 17 today.

In your tragic Tuesday media column: the ad slump is *almost* over, the NYT Co. sells its classical music station, an act of God stops Bob Woodruff in Iraq, and a eulogy for a murdered Complex magazine intern.

In 2006 ABC's Bob Woodruff was seriously injured in a bombing by Iraqi insurgents while covering the war for his network. Today he returned for the first time since the incident.

In your superior Monday media column: the internet fights with the old media and wins (sort of), an old man makes comical remarks about women, Bob Woodruff returns to Iraq, and the Harvard Business Review is smarter than everyone.

• Looking to buy a struggling business magazine that's losing advertisers right and left? You're in luck. McGraw-Hill has put BusinessWeek up for sale. [BN]
• The hottest interview in TV-land right now? Bernie Madoff, naturally. [B&C]
• Not such great news for the television biz: Most networks are experiencing a double-digit drop in summer ratings compared to last year. [USAT]
• MySpace is no longer a "place for friends." (That's what Facebook is for.) It's a Web site "for accessing entertainment and related information." [WSJ]
• Former Observer reporter Gabriel Sherman takes a look at Observer owner Jared Kushner in this week's issue of New York. Among other things, Kushner says he found the paper "unbearable" until he bought it. [NYM]
• Brüno's $30 million gross made it No. 1 at the box office this weekend. [THR]

Ryan Seacrest's executive producer feared seeming fey, CNET's Natali Del Conte feared losing marbles, and Bob Woodruff feared he wouldn't be popular on Twitter. And if you read Twitter all day, you'd be afraid too:

Congrats, Andy Samberg, you've reached the big 3-0! The good news? You still look 24! Others celebrating today: Ed Norton is 39, Patrick Swayze is 56, and comedian Denis Leary is 51. ACLU president Nadine Strossen is 58. Frances Bean Cobain, the spawn of Kurt Cobain and Courtney Love, is 16. Christian Slater turns 39. ABC's Bob Woodruff is 47. NFL star Jeremy Shockey is 28. And writer, director, and international fugitive Roman Polanski is 75.

Page Six correctly identifies ABC News correspondent and former World News Tonight anchor Bob Woodruff once today before reporting on his tour of the Bethesda Naval Hospital, visiting soldiers "who've suffered traumatic brain injuries like Woodward's," in their words (and our emphasis). Well, Watergate journo Bob Woodward may have dropped off a bit in recent years, but that "traumatic brain injury" accusation seems a bit harsh, even for Page Six. And where is Woodward catching shrapnel exactly? Embedded with the contractors replacing the cabinets in his Georgetown kitchen?

"ABC News Anchor Bob Woodruff to be Roasted for Spina Bifida." Jeez, hasn't the poor guy suffered enough already? [PRNewswire]

During a briefing yesterday concerning the recommendations of a panel appointed to investigate the treatment of our wounded soldiers, President Bush singled out former ABC News anchor Bob Woodruff, who was grievously injured in Iraq.

The Newseum, a gallery dedicated to the profession of journalism, is almost ready for visitors! Soon-to-be-former Times media reporter Kit Seelye takes a look at the monument to press freedom, decidedly one of the most expensive museums under construction.

• Howell Raines' new book — The One That Got a Way — has an unoriginal title. [WWD]
• Bidding for Plame memoir reaches seven figures. And it sounds like the Howell Raines book party was boring. [NYP]
• People named Time Inc.'s mag of the year, for its excellent coverage of, among other things, the ill-fated Zellweger-Chesney nuptials. [WWD]
• More investors are shorting Times Co. stock. Oh, poor Pinch. [NYP]
• ABC anchor Bob Woodruff's recovery continues, but it's still unclear when he'll be able to return. [LAT]
• More evidence 750 Third Avenue will rival 4 Times Square in coolness: New cafeteria will offer sushi bar, custom salad station, international specials. [Media Mob/NYO]
• Well-hung Clinton to speak at News Corp. retreat. [Media Mob/NYO]
• Forbes editor Bill Baldwin doesn't read Jon Friedman's column. [MW]

• Bonnie's rich AMI contract is up at the end of June, and — as one of her mags gets shut down and another's redesign is more or less undone — negotiations are underway. Great timing, eh? [NYP (second item)]
• Newspapers execs met in Chicago, surrounded by dinosaur skeletons. Sexy Jon Fine enjoys that metaphor, as he should. [BizWeek]
• Who does Spin hire to replenish its now-virtually-empty staff ranks? An alt-porn auteur and star, naturally. [FBNY]
• Injured ABC anchor Bob Woodruff sends note to colleagues, releases photo. We're very pleasantly surprised to see that he does, in fact, still look like an anchorman. [AP/USAT]
• Forward politics writer E.J. Kessler to move to New York Post op-ed gig. Because people jump from socialist to conservative papers all the time. [Forward]
• All the standard kvetches about media? Wrong, wrong, and wrong, says Bill Powers. [NJ]
• Arthur Gregg Sulzberger, the son of Pinch who we've attempted to saddle with the nickname Prince, to leave the Providence Journal for The Oregonian in Portland. Wonder where he'll end up? [Providence Phoenix]
• NYT Congress reporter Sheryl Gay Stolberg to become paper's White House reporter. [Media Mob/NYO]
• The Voice loses another, this time investigative reporter Jennifer Gonnerman. [Media Mob/NYO]
• Are Conde Nast editors being shut out of Devil Wears Prada screenings? Um, no. [WWD]

• New York to anoint hot young editors; those photographed rumored to include TNR's Franklin Foer, The Atlantic's James Bennet, Roger Hodge of Harper's, and the Paris Review's Philip Gourevitch, who, at 44, calls the whole conceit into question. [Media Mob/NYO]
• The Times nominated Dargis for a Pulitzer, and no one there understands why; New York is pitching a Look Book book. [WWD]
• The Washington Post gets 88 New York Timeses every day, costing $18K annually. At least it's nice to know someone other than us isn't getting free papers. [WCP]
• Cargo was confused, and nobody will miss it. Um, yeah. [Slate]
• Bob Woodruff, the ABC anchor badly wounded in Iraq, last night received the Radio and Television Correspondents Association's David Bloom award, named for the NBC correspondent who died while covering the early days of the Iraq war. [B&C]

• Judy Miller finally figured out why her Times career went to hell: It was the bloggers' fault. Of course it was. [Slate]
• Six weeks later, ABC anchor Bob Woodruff is released from the hospital to continue his rehabilitation elsewhere. [ABCNews]
• And 18 months later, NYT researcher Zhao Yan is released from prison after the Chinese government withdraws state-secrets charges. [NYT]
• Jon Friedman's doesn't love Mike Wallace. [MW]
• Coming soon: Isaac Mizrahi: The Magazine? [WWD (second item)]

• As Fairchild is integrated into Conde Nast, portraits of the Fairchilds go, a fancy cafeteria arrives, and garlic is banned. [NYO]
• Absolute mag might live again, that to Realtor William B. May. At the very least, the already-completed next issue will be distributed. Oh, and that trademark thing the Post was all worried about last week? Not a big deal, May says. [NYP (second item)]
• ABC's Bob Woodruff still has a face for TV, his brother reports. The talking for TV? Less so. [NYDN]
• Judy Miller admits she was wrong! OK, the other Judy Miller, and about moving to New York. [Romenesko]
• Maer Roshan delays your plane. [Media Mob/NYO]

• Penguin wins auction for Alan Greenspan memoir with an offer believed to be nearly $9 million. Obligatory question: Irrationally exuberant? [NYP]
• The dude behind the allegedly forthcoming mags Everything for Men and Everything for Women is a con artist and a felon. Unlike most mag people, who are merely con artists. [WWD]
• Arthur S. holds his State of the Times meeting; reporters question why he gets paid so much and they so little. [Media Mob/NYO]
• ABC's Bob Woodruff reportedly now conscious and talking, though heavily medicated. [ABCNews.com]
• Air America could lose its New York affiliate on April 1. We'd be bummed, if we ever listened to it. [NYP]
• The Jew and the gays brought Oscar his second-worst ratings since 1987. [WP]
• Does Diane Sawyer want to anchor World News Tonight? One gossip site says so. [TMZ]
• Candace Bushnell to launch weekly Sirius Satellite Radio show giving advice to women. First piece of advice we'd like her fans to hear: "They're just cupcakes. Stop waiting on a line around the corner for them." [NYDN]
• Will Nick Sylvester be a Stephen Glass, a Mike Barnicle, or a Janet Cooke? [Media Mob/NYO]

• NYT's James Bennet is The Atlantic's new editor. We have nothing witty to say about this. [NYT]
• ABC anchor Bob Woodruff is making "good" progress in his recovery. No jokes here, either. [Newsday]
• Want to read early handicapping of the Pulitzer Prizes? Nor us. But someone must, right? [E&P]
• Jann Wenner shares a "hunk of meat" with Playboy CEO Christie Hefner and Time Inc. chair Ann Moore. We had no idea Matt Nye was so broadminded. [Mediaweek]
• Diversity Council's report terms Times "a newspaper at risk" on diversity issues. Hey, why should things be different on that issue than everywhere else? [Media Mob/NYO]
• Tuesday night, journalists talked about themselves. Obligatory mah-nishtanah joke here. [WWD (second item)]

In addition to, you know, all the other deaths in Iraq, our merry little jaunt abroad has taken the lives of Atlantic editor Mike Kelly and NBC correspondent David Bloom, as well as the hand of Time reporter Mike Weiskopf. But now that it's threatened the life of ABC News anchor Bob Woodruff, this shit is serious. If you fuck with our square-jawed anchors, it means war.