Used to be that bankers were men—big men, who were at least bluffing at having big dicks, who worked themselves half to death, then partied like rock stars, if rock stars were incredibly boring conversationalists. Nowadays? Banks are trying to make their employees fucking church ladies.
When Wall Street began crumbling yesterday, the rich bemoaned the loss of their money. Everybody else in New York immediately said to themselves: "Jiminy Cricket, could this be the end of mandatory bottle service in shitty clubs full of rich pricks?" I mean, it was the universal response! Bottle service rules require the purchase of a wildly overpriced bottle of liquor just to enter a club. But early indications are that Manhattan nightclubs may already be putting the $450 bottle of Grey Goose to rest. Dare we even hope?: (What I generically imagine are) Shitty one-syllable clubs Quo, Myst, and Prime didn't wait even a full day to send out this press release to Alex Geana:
