• Those rumors about Tiger Woods in rehab have returned. According to People, Woods checked into a sex rehab clinic around New Year's and will be there until "Valentine's Day or thereabouts." (Perfect timing!) As for his estranged wife, Elin Nordegren, she's moved into a new home that's just a couple of miles from the gated community where she used to live with Woods. [People, TMZ, NYDN]
• Have Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel split up? That's what some people are saying, since she spent the last week climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro while he was in Jackson Hole, Wyoming. And couples that are really in love would never spend a moment apart, would they? Didn't think so. [Radar]
• The Post reported a few days ago that Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly have made plans to get married in November. Naturally, this had led the Daily News to report today that the story is totally untrue and the couple hasn't even discussed getting engaged, at least according to one of Minka's friends. [NYDN]
• Forbes released its list of Hollywood's "top-earning couples" yesterday. The winner? That would be Beyoncé and Jay-Z, who reeled in $122 million last year, or more than double what Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt collected. Possibly related: Beyoncé said yesterday that she plans to take a "hiatus" from singing so she can "live life." Which is what you'd do, too, if you made nine figures over the last 12 months. [Forbes, NYDN]
• The Conan-Leno mess is bad news for NBC. But it's also made late-night TV sorta watchable again, which is nice. [Gawker]

"Eat my panties off me," Mrs. Pratt rhythmically coos. Vogue threatens Anna Wintour's town car, Elin Nordegren invests in another house, Ryan Seacrest cries over Simon. Come, plumb the depths of Wednesday's gossip.

• This is going to come as a big shock to you, we're sure, but it seems Alex Rodriguez has been hooking up with several women since splitting up with Kate Hudson. A-Rod also "keeps bragging that Madonna is still texting him all the time," although for Madonna's sake, let's hope that isn't true. [P6]
• Angelina Jolie has been dropped as the face of the clothing brand St. John in favor of red-headed model (and the wife of Jack White) Karen Elson. Why the change? It seems St. John concluded that Jolie was too famous and had "overshadowed the brand." [NYDN]
• Related: Did Brad Pitt deal weed in college? No, but he kind of looks like he may have what with that scraggly beard he's been sporting recently. [NYP]
• Usher had more than $1 million in jewelry, furs, and electronics stolen from his SUV in mid-December. Exactly why he had all this stuff stored in his car of all places—and why he only noticed now—is unclear. [TMZ]
• Tila Tequila was set to be interviewed on Larry King Live, but CNN yanked the "Casey Johnson tribute" at the last minute. Did the network realize giving a mentally-ill publicity addict was a bad idea? (Unlikely; the Balloon Boy dad was a guest the other night.) Maybe CNN worried about getting sued? Who knows, but you can always go to Twitter (where she's tweeted about Johnson's death more than 160 times over the past week), or go to People's website for your "Tila Tequila exclusive interview," if you must. [TMZ, E!, People]

Arpad "Arki" Busson sneaking out of ex-fiancée Uma Thurman's Village townhouse yesterday, shortly before Thurman made her exit as well ... Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie running errands in Midtown during the day and heading into Alto on Madison Avenue for dinner ... Catherine Zeta-Jones leaving her apartment building ... Kelly Ripa getting in a cab with her son ... Kathy Griffin shooting scenes for Law & Order: SVU with Christopher Meloni and Mariska Hargitay ... Jessica Szohr walking to the set of Gossip Girl at Silvercup Studios in Queens ... Jessica and Ashlee Simpson going to dinner last night ... Katharine McPhee arriving at her hotel ... and Jersey Shore's Snooki and J-Woww posing for pics in the Flatiron District.

[Brad and Angelina (we don't need their last names at this point, right?) leave a New York City restaurant last night and are assaulted by light and noise; image via INF]

L.A. Dodger Matt Kemp squeezed Rihanna. Who's happier, him or the photographer who shot it? Vince Vaughn gets married. Gaga gets a new look. Jeremy Piven has a lobotomy scar? Tuesday gossip has room for argument.

David Duchovny walking his dog on the Upper East Side this morning ... Ashlee Simpson leaving her apartment on Saturday ... Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie taking Maddox, Pax, Zahara and Shiloh to see Mary Poppins on Broadway ... Matthew Broderick walking in the West Village ... Catherine Zeta-Jones leaving her apartment on Central Park West with her dog ... Angela Lansbury sitting in a car outside the Walter Kerr Theatre ... Pete Wentz walking by himself ... and Conan O'Brien shopping with wife, Liza, on Madison Avenue.

Emmy Rossum and boyfriend Adam Duritz sitting in the stands at last night's Rangers game ... Brad Pitt leaving the Waldorf Astoria with son Pax, and later playing games at Dave & Busters in Times Square ... Angelina Jolie arriving on the set of Salt at Pier 66 ... Catherine Zeta-Jones walking out of her apartment building on Central Park West ... and Sarah Jessica Parker heading to Lincoln Center with son James for a matinee performance of The Nutcracker.

[Until he's elected to another office—any office—Rudy is reintroducing the bums to Times Square, starting with Brad Pitt, who was on 42nd Street yesterday taking the kids to Dave and Busters. Image via INF]

Jimmy Kimmel walking around SoHo yesterday with friends ... Diane Kruger shopping for baby clothes on the Upper East Side ... Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon arriving at JFK ... Sarah Jessica Parker walking to the public library in the West Village with son James ... Bethenny Frankel leaving Rockefeller Center yesterday after an appearance on the Today show... Ugly Betty's America Ferrera walking her dog on Broadway, just south of Union Square ... Catherine Zeta-Jones signing autographs outside the Walter Kerr Theatre on Monday night ... and Brad Pitt carrying daughter Shiloh on the set of Salt at Pier 66.

This time she won't earn money for it, though. Charlie Sheen's wife's 911 call is out, and terrifying. Spencer Pratt is jealous of Jersey Shore. Paparazzi get pissed at Angelina. Come and get your Tuesday gossip!

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt picking up a few things for the kids from a street vendor on Park Avenue ... Lindsay Lohan leaving Century 21 with an armful of bags last week, and sitting in the stands at a Rangers game at Madison Square Garden on Saturday ... Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick carrying their twin daughters in the West Village ... Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz shopping at the Union Square Greenmarket on Thursday and leaving their apartment on Saturday ... Liam Neeson walking his dog in Millbrook, New York ...and Natalie Portman going into a building late last week with her dog, Charlie.

Sienna and Jude's balls: Barbados-bound. Together they'll make domestic reconciliation layer cake. Lady Gagadong's moneyballs will drop on New Years. William Hurt is your new existential bicycle. Gene Simmons is still trying to rock. Presenting your Saturday Morning Gossip Roundup:

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt stopping off for a bite to eat at a branch of Cafe Metro in Midtown on Sunday ... Reese Witherspoon arriving at JFK on Monday night and crossing the street yesterday ... Hugh Jackman, Dustin Hoffman, John McEnroe, and Rangers goalie Henrik Lundqvist attending a Knicks game ... Ashlee Simpson shopping at FAO Schwarz and Barneys with her sister, husband and baby ... Dancing with the Stars' Derek Hough getting out of a cab in Midtown ... Naomi Watts checking her phone while walking downtown ... and Mary-Kate Olsen leaving her apartment clearly unprepared for the cold weather.

[One of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's brood would rather eat a PB&J at lunch in Manhattan. Image via INF]

Because the gossips say they're working on a new baby, but I'm not sure we can believe it until the beard is accounted for. Kevin Jonas is getting married, Snooki lost her job, Elin Nordegren hires a lawyer. TGIFriday Gossip.

Katie Holmes, actress and Bride of Scientology, turns 31 today. Hard-charging hedge fund manager Dan Loeb is turning 48. Brad Pitt turns 46. Steven Spielberg is turning 63. Christina Aguilera is celebrating her 29th birthday today. Dan Klores, the publicist turned documentary filmmaker, is marking his 60th. The head of the American Federation of Teachers, Randi Weingarten, is 52. Memorial Sloan-Kettering president (and Nobel Prize winner) Harold Varmus is turning 70. Troubled rapper DMX is 39. Keith Richards of the Rolling Stones is 66. Ray Liotta is turning 55. Model agency owner Faith Kates is 52. And former Miss USA Tara Conner is turning 24 today. A bunch of weekend birthdays is below.

Brad goes out of town and Angie flies into a depressive rage, Madonna's face is bloated (with restylane?), Anne Hathaway is in a car crash with a stylish cyclist. Thursday's gossip is full of peril.

[Angelina Jolie loves Muhammad Ali so much, she tries to convince Brad Pitt to let her adopt him at the UNICEF Ball in Beverly Hills last night. Image via Getty]

• There's both good and bad news for Mischa Barton. The bad: She's reportedly drinking again and was seen "knocking back shots and drinking margaritas" earlier this week. (As you may remember, that sort of behavior led Mischa to spend some time in the hospital this past summer.) The good news: She supposedly looked "healthy" and "in control" while doing it, so it should be a few months before she hits bottom again and is forced to make a return trip. [P6]
• Think a good thought for Madonna. Louis Vuitton has decided to drop Madge as the face of the brand and replace her with 25-year-old supermodel Lara Stone. [Sun]
• The last 24 hours of Tiger: Holly Sampson, the porn star who had been suspected of having a tryst with Tiger, confirmed the rumor yesterday; meanwhile, Hollywood madam Michelle Braun says Woods spent $60,000 on hookers between 2006 and 2007, was into the "college cutie, girls-next-door look," and was a fan of three-ways, too. Luckily for Tiger, the reports about his dozen or so mistresses (and all the kinky specifics) may not spell disaster for his marriage to Elin Nordegren. Several tabloids report that Woods has come clean to Elin about "all" of his misbehavior in recent days and she's planning to stay with him.