After hearing reports that Britney Spears's manager Sam Lutfi was playing drug dealer for his mentally unhinged client, we immediately flashed back to the analogy section of the SATs when we realized that Sam Lutfi : Britney Spears :: Howard Stern : Anna Nicole Smith. For the first time in our lives, we're on Team Lynne Spears for banning the Lufti from the Spears Unit. If only Anna's southern dumb belle of a mother had written a scathing note to a judge like this one Lynne submitted as part of a restraining order filed against Lufti:

Britney Spears, her no longer estranged mom Lynne and sketchball manager Sam Lufti hit a Beverly Hills Mercedes-Benz dealership earlier this afternoon in search of some good old-fashioned retail therapy. Brit Brit arrived on the scene dressed in typical scattershot fashion: faux intellectual glasses, the dirtiest pair of cowboy boots west of El Paso and some sort of belly-baring lace-accented sweater thingie. And in case you're wondering, no, she didn't buy anything. Good thing, considering she still doesn't have a valid driver's license. [TMZ]

Last night, a quasi-dramatic screaming match between Britney Spears and her manager Sam Lufti quickly turned from a typical Monday With Britney™ into a full-on Mariah-style breakdown. After a barefoot and bruised-cheeked Britney called current loudmouth boytoy paparazzo Adnan saying, "Baby, come get me," The Animal's estranged parents rushed onto the scene, as did the LAPD. When the frantic Adnan finally arrived, he was denied entrance to Brit's castle and then became engaged in one of the eeriest text message conversations we've ever seen (conveniently delivered via iPhone!):