There are plenty of ways to arouse suspicion as a sitting governor. Here’s a pretty good one from Alabama’s Robert Bentley, who is currently beating back a festering adultery scandal: personally purchasing cheap burner phones at Best Buy.

Does Jay Z have a special Rihannaphone? Maybe! Eh, who knows.

The good news: Burning Man is over. The bad news: The burners are back in town. Once a year, the Bay Area's most troublesome pyromaniacs head out of town, leaving Silicon Valley cubicles deserted and Mission barstools empty, as they fill up Black Rock City, the temporary site in the Nevada desert for the now-ended arts and counterculture festival. Despite Caltrans's best efforts to block their return by closing the Bay Bridge, they've come back — except for one sad suicide. It's never the ones you wish would off themselves who do, of course. Take Paul Addis — please. The man accused of prematurely setting fire to Burning Man's giant wooden statue was one of the first to return, beating a hasty retreat after spending time in a Pershing County jail. At a Labor Day barbecue, blogger Scott Beale taped Addis in a pseudoconfessional rant.