Knicks star Carmelo Anthony and a man who is not business magnate Russell Simmons marched in Baltimore today, Fox News’ Geraldo Rivera confirmed this evening in an awkward on-camera interview.

Last night Time magazine had their big fancy shindig for its "100 Most Influential" list and many of the anointed showed up to Jazz at Lincoln Center to be rich, famous, and beautiful together.

Our invitation must have been lost in the mail, but we did send fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern to ask everyone some questions. No one responded to her querulous queries, but we have to print something, so here is what she asked everyone.

On Conan, Carmelo Anthony, who was just traded to the Knicks, dodged countless questions regarding where he would be traded to. He actually made it seem like he was going to stay in Denver.