Buried among more disturbing revelations in the Senate Intelligence Committee's new report on CIA's torture programs is this darkly hilarious tidbit: George W. Bush asked not to be told the locations of CIA detention facilities because he was worried he'd "accidentally disclose" the secret intel.

Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice has announced that she will not be speaking at Rutgers University's commencement after students and faculty protested. The protests surrounded Rice's involvement in the Iraq War.

Former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice spoke at the RNC tonight.

On today's episode of the 700 Club, not-dead televangelist Pat Robertson was intrigued by a snippet from his co-host Kristi Watts' interview with Condoleezza Rice. Rice said her favorite Thanksgiving food is mac 'n' cheese, a sentiment that Watts seconded. So Pat Robertson hears this, notes that the two ladies' skins have similarly high melanin levels, and asks, "What is this mac 'n' cheese? Is that a black thing?" It is! It grows on trees, in Africa.

Condoleezza Rice was Jon Stewart's guest on the Daily Show this evening. The interview started out friendly enough as Stewart and Rice shared laughs over Muammar Gaddafi's creepy obsession with the former secretary of state. But there was plenty of tension in the room when the subject turned to the decision to invade Iraq. Highlights from the interview are above.

Rebels ransacking Libyan ruler Muammar Qaddafi's compound found a strange artifact yesterday: A big album of close-up pics of former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice. Even brutal dictators have schoolboy crushes, apparently.

On tonight's 30 Rock, Jack was distraught to find out that his wife, Avery, had been abducted by North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il. So it's good thing he used to date Condoleezza Rice—who guest starred as herself—and could ask her to lobby for Avery's release, right? If only he hadn't broken up with her via text message that one time...

Famous war-loving ex-Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice is generally considered the greatest pianist in (White House) history. Last night she brought her skills to Philadelphia, backing Aretha Franklin at a fundraiser. Look at her go! Why aren't they constantly touring?

Many have speculated about Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan's sexuality based partly on her love of softball. Condi Rice, subject of similar rumors, apparently decided there wasn't enough lesbian sports innuendo this week: She's written a paean to women's basketball.

Fashion publicist and MTV reality show fixture Kelly Cutrone turns 44 today. Chris Noth is turning 55. Whoopi Goldberg is 54. Gerard Butler celebrates the big 4-0 today. Jimmy Kimmel is 42. Film director Garry Marshall is turning 75. Former Jets quarterback Vinny Testaverde turns 46. Sun Microsystems co-founder Scott McNealy is 55. Veteran TV reporter Peter Arnett turns 75. Strokes bassist Nikolai Fraiture is turning 31. Joe Mantegna is 62. And NBA star Ron Artest is turning 30. A handful of weekend birthdays are below.

• Gwyneth Paltrow's latest goal? To get Mario Batali to lose weight, apparently. She's supposedly already given him a free membership to the gym she's opening with Tracy Anderson, since he's "the only fat friend she has, and wants him to change." [P6]
• Poor Jennifer Aniston has been "holed up" in her room at the Greenwich Hotel since arriving in New York a few weeks ago, supposedly because she's terrified of "bumping into Angie" on the street. [L&S]
• Michael Phelps and Miss California, Carrie Prejean. are apparently dating, or at least that's what Prejean's grandmother is saying. [NYDN]
• In an interview with Ellen DeGeneres, Lindsay Lohan says she's "still in love" with Sam Ronson, and that their breakup "came out of nowhere." She's also lost a lot of weight, which you've probably already noticed. [OK!, People, NYDN]
• Tim Gunn says he hasn't been on a date in 26 years, but that he's okay with it because he's "very happy being alone." [NYDN]

• Despite the gloomy predictions last week, this year's Oscars did better than last year's telecast: Ratings were up 13% according to Nielsen. [THR]
• Condi Rice has signed a three-book deal with Crown worth $2.5 million. [AP]
• The parent company of the Philadelphia Inquirer and the Philadelphia Daily News filed for bankruptcy protection on Sunday. [E&P]
• Some analysts are suggesting News Corp. shed its newspaper assets. [NYT]
• Conan's finale on Friday earned the show its best ratings in two years. [NYP]
• Ad guru Peter Arnell's rebranding work for Tropicana didn't work out as planned, and now the company says it will go back to its old packaging. [NYT]

After Hillary Clinton wore this distinctive coat at a Tokyo airport Monday, one blogger predicted quite plausibly it would "fly off the rack." Her female predecessors had signature adornments too:

Want to entertain attendees at your next Rotary Club luncheon with amusing anecdotes about the disastrous war in Iraq, the mismanagement of US foreign policy, and the crumbling of diplomatic relations with countless foreign nations? Glad to hear it, since just hours after the inauguration, Condoleezza Rice signed with William Morris "to pursue opportunities that will likely include books and lectures." [Variety]

Wow: Condoleezza Rice got $316,000 in bejeweled gifts from the kings of Jordan and Saudi Arabia last year, three times more than the president. She must be doing an amazing job!

Condoleezza Rice played the piano for the Queen of England! Why? Because it's the end of the second term of the Bush administration, and after next month no one will let her do anything fun anymore. The whole "Israel and Palestine peace process" thing kinda fizzled out for our nation's top diplomat so now she's just on a "shit I get to do because I'm still the Secretary of State" tour. Maybe next Sunday she'll call plays for the 49ers! There is a video after the jump.

Fox News anchor (and former CNN hottie) Bill Hemmer turns 44 today. Prince Charles is celebrating his 60th. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice turns 54 today. Fashion designer Stefano Gabbana is 46. Reverend Run is 44. Writer P.J. O'Rourke is 61. Actor Josh Duhamel is turning 36. Jonathan Landman of the Times is 56. And Travis Barker, who almost didn't make it to his birthday this year, turns 33 today. Weekend birthdays after the jump.

Glamour magazine's annual "Women of the Year" awards took place last night at Carnegie Hall. Honorees like Hillary Clinton, Nicole Kidman, and Tyra Banks were joined by the likes of Debra Messing, Fergie, Natalie Portman, Tinsley Mortimer, America Ferrera, Jane Krakowski, Salman Rushdie, Condoleezza Rice, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and Taylor Swift. Click through for a few photos of the event.

A couple years ago, the CIA was instructed by the Justice Department to waterboard and torture all the al-Qaeda members they secretly detained in illegal prisons. But the CIA got a bit worried! Because, you see, administrations come and go, but the CIA is forever. They've become quite skilled as ass-covering. So they pressured the White House to give written policy approval of "enhanced interrogation techniques." Why? So they could leak the memo to the Washington Post in case someone like Condi Rice tried the "it was all the CIA's idea and we knew nothing" line. Which she did! Condi told Congress last month that the Bush administration was "initially uneasy about a controversial CIA plan for interrogating top al-Qaeda suspects." She says she asked someone to look into whether the torturing was legal or not. But the CIA remembers it differently.

As rumors circulate that Condoleezza Rice was passed up for John McCain's vice presidential slot due to questions about her sexuality, her film portrayer Thandie Newton sat down for an interview with gay magazine The Advocate. The actress, who is playing Rice in Oliver Stone's election-tipping presidential fantasia W., said that she herself doesn't believe Rice is a lesbian — and it's too bad, because Newton has the same-sex experience that could have informed such a role: