Things are super-fun in finance right now! Richard "Chip" Bierbaum, who is related to megasocialite Tinsley Mortimer (his stepfather is Tinsley's husband Topper's father's brother! Parse that!), and five of his bosses were cruelly let go from Calyon, the i-bank arm of Credit Agricole SA, over monster losses of $353 million. Mr. Bierbaum disputes that any of this is his fault and that he most certainly was not maintaining what the company called an "unusually large market position'' that was "above the authorized limit."

For no known reason, former L.A. gang girl Leyla Safai has arrived in New York in an ice cream truck named Heartschallenger. "'People think, like, unicorns and hearts, that that somehow translates into, like, optimistic, and I'm like the fucking most hard-core L.A. bitch you'll meet in your life,' Ms. Safai said as she lapped up a Fudgesicle." [NYO]

The Insider and Fox News are reporting that tragic former child star Lindsay Lohan has checked into Cirque Lodge in Utah. You know, the 'hab that worked so well for Mary-Kate Olsen and David Hasselhoff! But her rep has given an "exclusive" to Us that she's in rehab at an "undisclosed location." 'Oops' all around. Lindsay, sober up and fire your people!