The outcry over New York Post cartoonist Sean Delonas' dead monkey cartoon today is growing louder. But he has such a rich history! We assembled ten of his all-time classics of hate:

Will America never get its precious Commerce Secretary? Obama's latest Commerce nominee, Republican Sen. Judd Gregg, has just withdrawn from consideration. Maybe they shouldn't have picked a guy who opposes Obama on everything?

Doritos had the public submit proposed Super Bowl ads. Here's a concept that didn't win, for some reason: Pretzels have killed idiot President George W. Bush, eat Doritos instead! Ha. That's "not funny."

Every year someone starts moaning about the Academy Award voting procedures, saying they're unfair. This year it's the Wall Street Journal. They imagine a terrible alternate past in which Ishtar wins Best Picture.

For such a limp-eyed season of American Idol, this is what passes for scandal: contestant Joanna Pacitti, who has acknowledged a previous recording contract, has close ties to the show's producers, 19 Entertainment.

A parents' watchdog group is mad at Britney Spears. They find her new single's title too provocative and want it banned from radio play. But, really, what's so bad about "If U Seek Amy"?

Yesterday we noted that Prozac Nation author and now Yale Law School grad Elizabeth Wurtzel didn't pass the bar exam, which she took back in July. Some commenters were very mad! that we! would point this out! And others seemed a little more meh about it. Actually, maybe the most meh about it was Wurtzel herself who, when told about the post by the New York Observer, didn't really seem to give a shit:

This week's episode of cartoon iconoclast South Park, in which Indiana Jones was raped repeatedly by George Lucas and Steven Spielberg (see clip), is causing quite a commotion! The showrunners were, you know, just trying to voice their dissatisfaction with this summer's kinda crappy Indiana Jones fourquel, Kingdom of the — Wait What the Hell Is Shia LaBeouf Doing?, but people are wondering: did they go too far? Oh, and, ruh roh, it looks like the Indiana folks weren't given any warning. Nikki Finke heard that the folks at Paramount didn't know that Comedy Central, which is also owned by Viacom, would be harshly and extremely criticizing their precious little summer cashcow. Will heads roll? No, probably not. It's allllll just publicity and stuff. Though anything that Trey Parker and Matt Stone (the boys behind South Park) can do to stop the supposedly in-the-works Indy 5 from happening, I'd appreciate it thanks.

Aw, the Washington Post thinks it's people! Or, at least, it thinks it's a blog. In a recent review of the new teen scene cool beans summertime jams Jonas Brothers album (titled, sexually, "A Little Bit Longer"), critic J. Freedom du Lac (srsly?) called oldest and homeliest Jonas brother Kevin "the other one." Naturally this sent the band's legion of lusty teens (and potentially Steve Guttenberg) into a tizzy and they sat down, pink foam ringing their mouths, to write angry missives. The Post then sarcastically mocked them, blog style!

Yazmany Arboleda, the masterful young media manipulator and artist of debatable talent, still has the national press talking two days after the Secret Service shut down his "art exhibit" about the Assassination of Barack and Hillary. But that's okay, because now the kid is digging his own grave with grand pronouncements. Hoax, you say? No, this whole stunt is probably just over your head:

On MSNBC's Morning Joe show today, Courtney Hazlett reported on the current racial tiff between Spike Lee and Clint Eastwood. She reminded us that this isn't the first time the two have had issues: "Spike Lee got really uppity" about Eastwood's WWII movies before! I wonder what Spike Lee has to say about that. Click to watch the lady say the racist thing. [via PlanetGordon. Hazlett is the same reporter who said "we've almost had a dress rehearsal for this with Owen Wilson" when actor Heath Ledger died in January.]

The NYPD and the Secret Service shut down an art exhibition across the street from the New York Times building earlier this morning. The show's title was "The Assassination of Hillary Clinton/The Assassination of Barack Obama." This is today's "Thing most assured of getting in the tabloids tomorrow." The artist, Yazmany Arboleda, says his project is really about the media—he's definitely good at getting media attention, at least. He's even set up a website for each candidate's assassination (uh, in the media). Photos of his illegal work after the jump:

"Samantha looked at hooking up with random people as not a big deal, so that's what I did too." So says "Lisa" in an ABC News story today. A fan of Sex and the City, Lisa took after the hyperbolized New York City ladies when she was just an impressionable 14-year-old living on Long Island. She puffed cigarettes and swilled icky sticky Cosmopolitans (having sneaked into bars) like Carrie and she bed hopped and said things like "you have funky spunk," just like Samantha. (She did not, unfortunately, become a lawyer like Miranda; or, thankfully, become a shrill nuisance like Charlotte). "It wasn't 'Sex and the City's' fault. I love the show, but I think it made it a little easier to justify my behavior," she elaborates. Eventually, Lisa wised up and went and married a Mormon and moved to the blasted wastelands of Utah.

Gas... is cheap! An economist on how expensive cigarettes make smokers happy! Ugly people: are they actually pretty? Plus: Chris Hitchens on how George W. Bush was a better president than Lincoln! Tomorrow: Are you hungry? No you're not! [Slate]

Beauty product purveyor Dove has finally responded to allegations, first reported in a New Yorker story, that the company retouched photos of the "Real" women in its "Campaign for Real Beauty" ads. Which would make them big hypocrites. But according to a statement from Dove this morning (via its PR agency, Edelman), the New Yorker was wrong. The company even got a quotable refutation from controversy-courting celebrity photographer Annie Leibovitz! Their full denial is after the jump.

We didn't want to just let conservative blogger and gay porn veteran Matt Sanchez's unprovoked gay-cusations against all of Gawkerdom sit out in the blogosphere with no explanation. So we emailed him to get some clarity on his position. His first response to us: "The gawking subtleties of propaganda. The beleaguered gay activist is so sensitive and marginalized, that the only way to feel normal is to call everyone else defective. Can there be any wonder why a social subset with a life expectancy 20 years less than the majority of Americans is so bitterly suicidal?" Ha, WHAT? We didn't give up on understanding his subtle philosophy, though; we pressed him for the basis of his gay obsession. And he sent us not only a new picture of himself (pictured!) but these deeper thoughts on "gay jihadis" like YOU:

A certain right-wing blogger has a question for us, via email: "Are all of the contributors to Gawker homosexuals, because there's a level of superciliousness that must be directly tied to sexual frustration and the inability to bond with other human beings." Whoa! We'll have him know that Gawker employs a veritable handful of heterosexuals. This guy was ostensibly upset that our coverage of Absolut's pro-Mexico ad (which the company has now apologized for) was not quite xenophobic enough. But what led this Republican internet soldier to target us in our vulnerable gay spot? It's probably his own past as a gay porn star—that does have a tendency to color one's perceptions.

The story of Kristin Davis, who the Post fingered yesterday as not only a high-priced madam, but also another hooker visited by Eliot Spitzer, is actually getting more interesting. Why? Because every new story that comes out makes it less clear if Davis actually has any connection to Spitzer. The Post says she does! The Daily News says she doesn't! And the Times doesn't really say anything! Verrrrrrrrrrryyy interesting. Somebody has screwed up on this story, big time. After the jump, we speculate—plus, we have some insight into the Daily News' big "Madam's Black Book" cover story today.

There was a ton of debate about the death of Paul Tilley, the ad agency exec who committed suicide last month. Some people charged mean bloggers with helping to push him over the edge—charges that seemed increasingly ridiculous, as people took time to consider the full situation. But Liberty Mutual, the huge insurance company, had another thought about Tilley's death: what a great way to promote our company! And that's exactly what they did, the sickos.

Evil terrorist and fashion icon Osama Bin Laden is just like some slow, cranky old man: sitting around the cave, reading the newspaper, complaining about the funny pages. The world's most wanted criminal released another audio tape yesterday, specifically to condemn those stupid fucking Danish Muhammad cartoons, and threaten Europe with a "severe reckoning." The main cartoon (which is for sale, and pictured) was reprinted last month in a show of solidarity with the cartoonist, who lives in safe houses because his life is in danger [WP]. Still! For the stupid half-funny cartoon! Enough already, Muslim extremists! "I have always been an atheist, and I dare say these events have only intensified my atheism," the cartoonist tells the New York Times. Smooth move, extremists: you're making him like god even less. Nice spiritual persuasion there. Below, the full page of mediocre cartoons, once again. Gosh.