Why can't you suits understand: Kim Dotcom is just a simple man with a simple website who's definitely not burning with rage at the government officials who raided his mansion and arrested him almost exactly a year ago today?

You know that bit of legal-sounding text that all your friends are sharing on Facebook? "I hereby declare that my copyright is attached to all of my personal details..." blah blah blah? Yeah: it's meaningless. We'll show you why, line by line.

Owen Wilson will never say words out loud in this town again: The Hollywood Reporter writes that Sony Picture Classics is being sued by the owners of the rights to William Faulkner's literary works over two sentences the actor uttered in Woody Allen's 2011 film Midnight in Paris. The suit claims the lines violate copyright.

Forget SOPA. The biggest online intellectual property story last week was the shutdown of a website offering downloads of the cartoon My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, which shook the burgeoning "brony" community to its core.

Bronies (bro+pony) are adult male fans of the new series launched in 2010 based on the classic ‘80s My Little Pony toy that [spoiler] your mom secretly threw out your collection of when you went to college.

If you think bronyism sounds like something only a serious pervert living in his mother's basement would be into, you're only about 30% correct. To address your immediate question: it's not ironic. It's nerdy guys who genuinely enjoy an animated series about ponies. The show has a legitimate appeal to older audiences—high production values, snappy dialog, and a heartwarming message. But the online fan culture of bronies grew out of 4chan, so they have a computer nerd vestigial tail of Mountain Dew, anime appreciation, chronic virginity, and cyberbullying.

Bronies have their own news sites, fan forums, and even a healthy amount of fan art of ponies doing unspeakable sexual acts on Tumblr. They've had real life meet-ups, and an upcoming BronyCon in New York will feature appearances by voice actors from the show.

In the Land of Blood and Honey is being billed as Angelina Jolie's "writing and directorial" debut, but did she actually write it? Or did she adopt the movie's storyline from Bosnian-Croatian journalist/writer James J. Braddock's 2007 novel The Soul Shattering without his permission?

Looks like Robert and Diane Maresca—who attempted to trademark "Occupy Wall Street" earlier this week—aren't the only people trying to make a buck off of the protests! An Atlanta man is trying to get his own Occupy Wall Street-related trademark: "The words 'occupy this' with an arrow pointed down."

DJ Paulie Lis filed a suit in a Hartford court looking for $4 million dollars in damages because he says his DJ business and copyrighted name "DJ Paulie" have been rendered valueless ever since Jersey Shore's DJ Paulie Destruction came onto the scene. Turf war!

Inspired by recent litigation involving the copyrightability of Mike Tyson's Maori-inspired facial tattoo, some of America's law professors have contemplated a different-but-similar issue: whether American copyright law protects nose doctors' surgical masterpieces. The answer? Probably not, but it's not completely impossible.

A federal judge has denied tattoo artist S. Victor Whitmill's request for an injunction barring The Hangover 2 from opening because the studio didn't ask him for the rights to use Mike Tyson's face tattoo, which Whitmill designed and copyrighted. He still has a "strong likelihood of success" in eventually winning his case, though, according to the judge.

A lot of people use YouTube to upload original content of adorable babies. But a lot of people use it to post copyright-violating clips of TV shows and Lady Gaga videos. Now, YouTube copyright violators will be sentenced to "copyright school."

American genius David Byrne recently settled his copyright complaint against former Florida Gov. Charlie Crist, who used a Talking Heads song without permission in his U.S. Senate campaign, by making Crist film this 90-second abject apology and post it to YouTube.

America's favorite fighter jet Charlie Sheen, apparently realizing he is sitting on a hypothetical goldmine of branded paraphernalia, is attempting to trademark 22 of the phrases he's coined during his latest manic episode, including:

Visit the Bittorrent site Torrent-finder and you're greeted with a scary notice that "this domain name has been seized by ICE-Homeland Security Investigations." It's part of an intense anti-piracy operation. But the Pirate Bay is still up, so who cares?

A group of right-wing conspiracists has produced a 25-minute phantasm of Obama-rage posing as a "documentary," and it's airing in battleground states. Will Fox News sue to keep them from using its clips, like it does against Democrats? Probably not!

The U.S. Patent and Trademark Office has denied Jersey Shore denizen Nicole Polizzi's application to trademark her nickname, Snooki, for use in books. Why? It appears that a cartoon cat named Snooky beat her to it.

Do not cross New York gay porn impresario and neocon Zionist Michael Lucas by pirating his movies. Lucas' production company just sued 53 porn pirates for as much as $150,000 each. Sexy copyright infringement, ahoy!

The studio behind Downfall has been issuing copyright complaints about some of the more popular Downfall parodies on YouTube. This might be the first time war has been waged against a meme. The meme is going to win. [Mashable]

Scientologists just love copyright laws, because they allow them to demand that YouTube take down their extremely embarrassing internal videos. But when it comes to stealing other people's copyrighted material to make their own motivational cult films—that's different.

There seriously isn't, you guys. Because Sony took down the original Rick Astley video because of a terms of use violation. Sorry internet, no more Rick Rolls for anybody. Truly a sad day for memes.

Who knew Flickr users were so hardboiled? Not British daily The Independent, who stole from them pictures of....snow. Thrifty! This pissed off one copyrighted photographer, who posted his fun exchange with the digital director, who basically laughs him off. [Flickr]