We hope we didn't miss anyone (please note we don't care about Kimora Lee Simmons)...at the moment, it looks like Andy Dick and Whitney Houston are clear of any drug-related court actions, but the day is still young.

• We hear that Steve-O of Jackass fame was spotted claiming that he was "as niggery as fuck" to the black bouncer outside of LES bar Max Fish. Just in case you were wondering.
• Congrats to our baby brother, who finally got his first legal threat from Tom Cruise's lawyer. [Defamer]
• One of the Jonathan Brooklyn writers has a new website, complete with new essays. Just in case, you know, you're looking for something to do. [JL via Beatrice]
• We know you'd never limit your judging abilities to the denizens of NYC media. Share your talent and vote for the hottest brokers. Yep, August is really that slow. [Curbed]
• Courtney Love is off some sort of wagon. [CityRag]
• The LES Starbucks debate continues to putter along. Considering this furor seems to have found its home in the blogosphere, we're inclined to note that the people bitching (ourselves included) are kinda the reason there's a 'bucks on the way. [Eat Drink One Woman]
• Kimora Lee Simmons, the A&E Intervention! [WNBC]

By now you may have heard that Courtney Love passed out at the Roosevelt on Wednesday night, and yesterday morning was rushed to Cedars Sinai, the only fully accredited Celebrity Undisclosed Medical Emergency Care Facility in Los Angeles. Love told Rush & Molloy that she doesn't know what knocked her out, other than "not drugs":

• Courtney Love faints during a party at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel and awakens in Cedars-Sinai. She's adamant about her sobriety, and some are whispering about a possible poisoning. Dude, people, let Kurt Cobain go already. [R&M]
• Jane editor Jane Pratt escapes Tom Cruise unscathed: While filming her cameo in Vanilla Sky, some of Tom's friends (who we suspect were Thetanesque) approached Pratt about "getting to know Tom better." If only she had accepted, Joey Potter would still be with us. [Lowdown]
• Oh dear. After Ladies Home Journal beauty editor Nadine Haobsh gets her blog outed, Fashion Week Daily and New York mag's wee Faran Krentcil is supposedly behind Imaginary Socialite. [Page Six]
• While concert-goers in NYC, LA, and other major markets are paying up to $450 for prime seats for upcoming Rolling Stones shows, residents of "flyover country" are paying about $100 less. Nice to see that the coastal inflation isn't just limited to real estate. [Fox 411]

On the one hand, you're skinny, manic (some might say the life of the party!), and you assault the occasional fan with a microphone or let one suckle your breast in a Wendy's. On the other hand, you live a potentially longer, drug-free life, avoid repeated run-ins with cranky judges, and get your daughter back, but your new, "healthier" frame isn't doing that still-developing movie career any favors, and when you stand next to Pamela Anderson at a premiere, everyone is vaguely afraid that you might devour her.

· Courtney: So when’s the fat thing going to end?
Dave: When you stop eating.
Courtney: I’ve never been this fat in my life.
Dave: You need to stop eating. [via cityrag]
· Sharon Waxman and David O. Russell finally bury the hatchet, presumably with a minimum of fisiticuffs.
· Half-Blackface and Hanging Jokes: Two Johnny Carson Clips You Won't See on CNN This Week
· Yes, we did wind up quite minty fresh, thank you very much.
· The AP throws movie publicists a pity party after the Oscar noms were announced.
· No Shit Department: Jennifer Garner knew Elektra was going to suck and only did the movie because her contract said she had to.

· Original Michael Jackson Bad album art leaked to Craigslist!
· Beware: Kicking your drug habit might make you fat. But you'll get your kid back, so carefully weigh the pros and cons before attempting.
· Why else would anyone freeze their ass off outside the inauguration other than to swear loudly within earshot of a CNN camera?
· Say what you will about Christian conservative groups issuing a "gay alert" for SpongeBob, but we've always felt he was a little light in the cartoon loafers. Someone's going to catch him at the bathhouse with Tinky Winky, and then all hell's going to break loose in the Bible Belt.

Page Six reports that Courtney Love plans on selling her Manhattan apartment, pocketing the $6 million from the sale, and heading back to L.A. to start over and reclaim custody of daughter Frances Bean. No, really, she's serious this time! But Love doesn't stand a chance if we don't pitch in and make our city relapse-proof for the recovering addict. So, right now, go to your medicine cabinets and flush all of your prescription medications down the toilet. Yes, even that OxyContin that you had your assistant's doctor prescribe for her because your doctor finally discovered ethics and wouldn't approve yet another scrip for "migraines." Helping others is supposed to hurt. Oh, and someone should probably burn down some pharmacies in Beverly Hills, just to be safe.

· Oliver Stone's pro-Fidel Castro documentary has been bumped by the Tribeca Film Festival. [Page Six]
· Courtney Love in Rolling Stone: "I've never dated a guy with brown eyes, except for [Bush's] Gavin Rossdale,...I don't know if I've even fucked a dark-haired guy in my power yearssince 1989. Pre-1989, I pretty much fucked everybody. But it was because I had to get breakfast somehow." [Page Six]
· NBC's reality series about the opening of a Rocco di Spirito eatery, "The Restaurant," will air at the end of July. [Page Six]
· Restaurateur Jeffrey Chodorow co-owns what used to be the nightclub Chaos at 225 East Houston and is now the "Manhattan Gentleman's Club" strip joint. [NY Daily News]

· Palm Beach's Landmarks Preservation Commission think Donald Trump's coat-of-arms logos with his surname beneath them are "unseemly." Trump uses the same logo to advertise for his Park Avenue condos in New York, and the Palm Beachers believe the "New York" brand dilutes the value of the "Palm Beach" estate. [Page Six]
· Denise Rich is said to be another Leona Helmsley. She fires staffers citing budget cuts, but always replaces them, and came onto her ex-partner, Herbert Black. [Page Six]
· Liz Smith on the invite to the Vanity Fair Oscar party: "This came on some kind of heavy vellum papier-mache that must have cost newspaper tycoon Si Newhouse of Cond Nast a pretty penny. (The envelope alone is made of something one is tempted to keep and have made into a bulletproof vest.)" [Liz Smith]
· Courtney Love says "Every woman in America is on Xanax...You can go to a taco stand in L.A. and get it. It's the No. 2 drug in America, and it's completely addictive." Items on Bruce Springsteen's concert rider: beluga caviar on Carr water crackers, imported cheese, white linen tablecloths and a "large" box of Belgian chocolates. [NY Daily News]

We love Google, and Google apparently loves us back.
Search: Graydon Carter
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Search: Courtney Love, naked
Search: David Gest, psycho

This just in: Courtney Love's recent spree of bad behavior just culminated in an arrest at Heathrow after she was verbally abusive to the flight's cabin crew. Okay, Courtney. We know you're a bad girl and a big rock star. And getting arrestedvery scandalous. We're all shocked. Shocked. So can we stop now?
Courtney Love arrested after flight [AP]

Courtesy of Q Magazine. Ms. Will Someone Please Pay Attention to Me also set various things on fire and, as documented by the photos, got a bikini wax in a room full of people.
Courtney Love @ Q Magazine 3/03 [8ung.at via Kottke]

· Courtney Love calls fashion houses around the world in the wee hours of Friday morning demanding "perfect clothes" for Elton John's upcoming benefit for the Old Vic theater. [Page Six]
· Ted Turner officially moves to Florida. [Page Six]
· Page Six says Chelsea Clinton has been offered a job with "McKinney, the powerhouse consulting firm." Note to Page Six: that's McKinsey. [Page Six]
· Conde Nast employees, fascinated with the intricate workings of the Metrocard system, take public transportation. Juuuuuust kidding. [Page Six]
· Playwright Larry Myers is penning a play about the Raelians. [Page Six]
· Cindy Adams handicaps the BAFTAs; says Chicago will win. [Cindy Adams]
· Lara Flynn Boyle's tutu at the Golden Globes was an inside joke, as Jack Nicholson's other woman was a dancer, albeit "hardly the kind that trains at Juilliard." Rapper 50 Cent on Mariah Carey: ""I wanted to hit that...[Eminem] said he was finished [with her] so ... I just thought he was gonna hook me up." Bernie Goetz wants to build "squirrel houses" in New York. [NY Daily News]

· Universal isn't hosting its annual post-Grammy bash for fear of a rap-rivalry shootout. [Page Six]
· Page Six discovers the Hipster Handbook. [Page Six]
· Tina Louise was spotted tearing open a box of envelopes at Staples on Broadway and Broome, "taking a few to the cashier, and getting annoyed when she was informed she'd have to buy the whole box." [Page Six]
· Courtney Love strips during a photo shoot ("By the time the shoot was over, Courtney had set fire to things, poured Champagne over her head and had her bikini line waxed in a room full of people."); John Edwards is schmoozing moneyed New Yorkers; and Sharon Bush was having dinner at Le Cirque during the brother-in-law's State of the Union address. [NY Daily News]
· Ted Turner's getting married and ex-Sicor chief, Carlo Salvi, has purchased a stake in the Women modeling agency. Salvi's determined to make it work, as he's been the "pigeon" on other deals and needs to prove himself. Friends insist it's not about the girls. [The Word]

· After baby swallows tab of ecstacy, Jude Law decides it might be a good idea to turn down starring role in upcoming drug-running flick, White Powder [Cindy Adams]
· Tim Robbins whines that hockey opponents at Chelsea Piers are "too rough" [Page Six]
· Dick morris tells Gore he has to "ditch Clinton now" if he wants a shot in '04 [Page Six]
· Leonardo di Caprio caught videotaping his own scenes at Gangs of New York premier at the Ziegfeld [Page Six]
· Anna Wintour headed to Texas for the holidays to do some "writing" [Cindy Adams]
· Courtney Love prescribed Vicodin for a bee-sting by Winona Ryder's pill-pushing doctor [Page Six]
· Supermodel overdoses; Gore has no taste; Robert Downey Jr. is bitchy to the paparazzi at the Flaunt party; Pedro Almodovar's film is snubbed at home; and Weinstein insists he's not fighting with Katzenberg [NY Daily News]