We all have Facebook status updates we'd like to take back or 3am emails we shouldn't have sent, but for Courtney Love, the bar for internet humiliation is considerably higher. Luckily, our girl Court is nothing if not ambitious on the self-immolation front, and over the weekend, she topped her "Yay for Proposition 8!" fiasco with around 40 blog posts on her Myspace page that hinted at suicidal feelings and a love of clothes. In other words: nothing new, but oh, the frequency! Now, Love has posted a Perez Hilton-directed epilogue in which she renounces blogging and blames the bad reception to her Myspacepalooza on a whisper campaign started by Madonna:

• Apparently Courtney Love said something about being suicidal amid her 60 (!!) blog posts Sunday but she also said her mood was "pirate" (good, right??) and that "ebaz and mj dresses saved my life." Also putting on a dress made her feel pretty. Also: "Dada, circus."

♦ Is Kate Hudson trying to steal Alex Rodriguez away from Madonna? She was spotted with her "arms completely wrapped around" him at a party in Miami this weekend. But she might just be trying to steal Jason Statham away from his girlfriend, since the two were seen downing dirty martinis together. [NYDN, P6]
♦ A PETA activist pelted Lindsay Lohan with a bag of flour at an event in Paris on Saturday. Sam Ronson responded by dissing the activist on MySpace: "My dog is far more civilized than that person." [People]
♦ Kanye West was arrested in London on Friday after an altercation with a photographer. Now he's suggesting the entire episode was "bogus," and has upset some Brits by comparing himself to Princess Di. [People, The Sun]
♦ Sarah Palin may collect a $7 million advance if she writes a book. [MSNBC]

Last week, addled ghost flapper Courtney Love celebrated the elections the best way she knew how: with a confused blog entry indicating she mistakenly voted "yes" on the anti-gay Proposition 8. Not one to let Drew Barrymore and James Franco hog all the credit, Love has now posted a series of blog updates meant to rectify the matter:

Now that California's Proposition 8 has passed, many celebrities are decrying the anti-gay rights measure — and then there's addled songstress Courtney Love. Your Defamer put in some time phone-banking for the "No on 8" cause before the election, and often we discovered that people thought they'd be granting gay people equal rights by voting "yes" on the proposition, a misconception they needed to be hastily disabused of. Sadly, Love never got the memo, and she took to her Myspace blog to brag about her yes vote and celebrate the proposition's passing:

• Sean Penn kissed a man for a movie, and for some reason sent an excited, rhyming text message to Madonna about it. [Fametastic]

Nutty and strangely adorable Courtney Love has job opportunities for you! First, she's seeking someone honest to clean up after her. "i need a non thieving non freaky housekeeper," she writes on her MySpace page. But the candidate doesn't have to be entirely "non freaky" she clarifies: "is anyone insanely clean neatfreak near malibu?" But if cleaning isn't your specialty, how are you with a camera? "also i need we need a documentarist, someone to document our studio as we go in wedsday, and i have ALOT of work to do til then and i wont just hand this to hbo or bbc 2 or bravo and god forbid not vh1! A DOCUMENATRY NOT A REALITY SHOW. get in touch with jason whp will further put you in touch with jason wienberg at untitled." The full ad after the jump.

Click to viewBoomp3.com An ectoplasmic life form in the shape of one time musician Courtney Love terrorized a local Malibu strip mall on Tuesday afternoon. The grunge icon floated from boutique to boutique, leaving behind a trail of fine green viscous goo while on a mission to find a pair of killer boots and jeans. Shelley Jones, an unsuspecting customer, was harassed by the malevolent force and wasn’t too happy about it. Jones said, “I’m trying on these jeans and I’m partially dressed when out of nowhere Courtney Love’s torso pops through the side of the dressing room mumbling something about a size 4 jeans. I didn’t know what to do. I tried to call for help, but what kind of help are you going to get at a snotty boutique?” [Photo Credit: X17] *A Call To The Bullpen is a work of fiction. Although the pictures we use are most certainly real, Defamer does not purport that any of the incidents or quotations you see in this piece actually happened. Lighten up, people ... it's a joke.

For some parents, raising a child alone after a partner has committed suicide is a sensitive thing. Then, as always, there is Courtney Love. Last seen recommending orgasms to the Jonas Brothers, the singer is once again in the news for spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on her daughter's 16th birthday party, a suicide-themed affair that included games like a "who can look the most dead" contest. No bonus points for dressing like Kurt Cobain, as that was Frances Bean's costume:

Though it's been a long while since Courtney Love caused controversy at the VMAs, the singer wasn't about to let last night's purity ring flap pass by without giving that virginal young upstart Jordin Sparks the what-for. Yes, even though Love claims not to have watched last night's ceremony (though she adores host Russell Brand), she took to her blog to denounce the latest crop of chaste young performers, giving them the sort of X-rated advice that would make a Jonas Brother blush (not that Miley, though — she's heard it all). We've excerpted the best bits below, though we warn you that they're hard to read — not because of their shock value, but because their author is the garrulous misspeller Courtney Love:

Hey, what did occasionally-genius rocker Courtney Love have to say about last night's Video Music Awards? Um: "i didnt go to the "VMAS" as we used to call them but theyve gotten so fucking Urban i dont know i guess Van Toffler thought ( hes an exec at MTV ) he was being edgy and he WAS by letting my darkling prince Brand host the mtv awards- but theyre not the "VMAS" and they never will be again - i had ZERO desire to watch let alone go and thats one of my very favourite people ive ever known or had the honour of being friends and fiends with hosting it so i feel horribly rude that my desire not to watch assholes with chastity rings- oh for fucks sake ive had some great conversations but not ONE has ever ended in an Orgasm." That was all one sentence, folks. [via her MySpace blog]

• Amanda Beard denies she's dating Michael Phelps because that would be "nasty." Michael, however, isn't commenting on whether or not he's dating Lily Donaldson, or anyone else. [NYP]

A couple of weeks ago, singer and serenity guru Courtney Love posted to her Myspace a long rant entitled "Ryan Adams you fucking weasel. deal with it.858,00$." No one knows exactly what Love said in the missive, precisely, but the scholarly consensus at this point is that it involved Adams using Love's American Express card and checkbook to pay for record expenses well above and beyond what Love felt had been authorized, possibly while Adams and Love were sexing one another. Also, Adams was supposedly spending money intended for Love's 15-year-old daughter, Frances Bean Cobain. Now Adams has linked, from a strange box in the upper-right corner of his Web homepage, something of a response. Or at least it seems that way. He could be talking about some other "reality-challenged" person accusing him of "fictonal crime against innocents." But probably not! An excerpt:

PrivacyWatch celebrity sightings are submitted by our millions of Defamer operatives. We'd like to remind you that this feature is powered by you, so if you want to see more installments of PrivacyWatch, then all you've got to do is to send us your sightings. Submit yours to tips[AT]defamer.com (please put "sighting" or "PrivacyWatch" in the subject line so we don't lose them) and tell everyone about the time you saw Courtney Love pawing through Benjamin Moore paint samples in Santa Monica.

I'm not sure what you guys wrote in the comments section of yesterday's item about Courtney Love's attack on Ryan Adams regarding all that money someone stole from her. But Ms. Love sure noticed. On her Myspace page today, she remarks, "I had a very heavy evening but since we are becoming terrifyingly great, I'm happy to oblige you Gawker people for about oh one more millisecond." Her full message after the jump.

Sober rocker Courtney Love posted an open letter to her myspace page last night, in which she charges that fellow musical mess Ryan Adams had something to do with stealing "858,00$" from her-and from daughter Frances Bean Cobain. Let's all try to make sense of it together, shall we?

Click to viewIt's shaping up as a cruel summer for drunk, high or otherwise messed up celebrities trying to stay on the straight and narrow. Comedian Andy Dick was arrested this week for groping a 17-year-old's breasts while in possession of marijuana and Valium, in something of a reprise of his bust last year for doing blow in a nightclub. Actress and teen rehab veteran Drew Barrymore is now reported to have boozed her way to a breakup with actor Justin Long. Heather Locklear fled "depression and anxiety" rehab in Arizona after barely two weeks. Even a Rolling Stone, Ronnie Wood, surrendered himself to rehab again after leaving his wife for a 19-year-old cocktail waitress — and two bottles of vodka per day. Maybe all that summer daylight is pushing everyone over the edge! In any case, it's tough to keep track of who's where on the customary arc of high-profile substance abuse: embarrassment, criminality, rock-bottom desperation, rehabilitation and then either another trip around the circle or a break into the freedom of sobriety. That's why we've compiled a guide to once and future inebriated celebrities: 20 actors, singers, models and socialites who hog way more than their fair share of space in the gossip pages — and here on Gawker. We'll update and expand this list over time as a sort of encyclopedia of shame; your comments and tips are encouraged. (The arrows, by the way, indicate trends in drunkenness, so an upward arrow means getting drunker, downward means getting more sober.)

On her MySpace blog, Courtney Love talks (and by talks we of course mean free-associates at great length) about going to stay at the London home of her close friends Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin. And what revelations follow! Gwynnie cooks in an Anthropologie apron, there are cigarettes and an ashtray, "She is a slip of a girl and light as a feather" (guess those daily three-hour exercise sessions and macrobiotic diet aren't a total waste of time), and Chris is not, in fact, devoid of personality as you might have been thinking. He has "a very lovely laugh." But most importantly, Courtney sets something straight, once and for all: Gwyneth's IQ is so high, the figure can't even be named.

The Times has a delightful story in this morning's paper on the ruses various celebrities use to evade reporters outside the main criminal courthouse in Manhattan. Actor Rip Torn, for example, once led paparazzi through a park and past a gaggle of chanting construction workers before jumping into the cab of an occupied 18-wheeler, jumping out again, and rolling underneath the truck. Kirk Jones snuck in a side entrance while his driver successfully impersonated the rapper to photographers, sultry actress Uma Thurman enlisted the help of court officers and producer Sean Combs has a mini secret-service brigade. But the most fascinating courthouse celebrity by far is criminally insane singer Courtney Love, who sashays in and out of the building as though surrounded by adoring fans:

A new book claiming to unveil "fun, fascinating facts" about celebrities and their drug habits may just be a collection of ancient quotes and anecdotes. As the NY Post reports today, The Curious World Of Drugs And Their Friends promises sordid tales involving Lindsay Lohan and details from her substance-fueled evenings before cokepants and trees put them on the back burner, but the story they cite from a "friend" sounds eerily familiar to one of our favorite classic Lohanisms from over a year ago. And the celebrities quoted as being "unable to talk to anyone without a nose full of cocaine," and having "spent the first 35 years of my life in a fog" due to drugs have either kicked their habits long ago or already (endlessly) confirmed to the world that they were once big league nose candy fans. The stars "featured," and exactly how dusty these quips are, after the jump.