• Kate Moss will not be charged with possession stemming from her September '05 cover shoot with the UK's Daily Mirror. Apparently something about a lack of evidence or being able to definitively prove she was bumping rails of blow and not, say, powdered sugar. You know how those skinny models love their powdered sugar! [Guardian]
• Heath Ledger and Michelle Williams didn't mean to snub Howard Stern at Nobu last week; they were just having "a very deep conversation about something in our personal life," says Ledger. Go ahead and read into that all you want, but they were likely just whining about Brooklyn. [Page Six]
• MSNBC host Keith Olbermann apologizes for telling a viewer to go fuck his mother. That was meant for Rita Cosby. [Lowdown]
• In a remarkable display of maturity, Lindsay Lohan turns down a round of shots, noting that she's underage. She still stayed out until 7 AM — thankfully, there's no age restrictions on marching powder. [R&M (bottom of page)]
• And after all that partying, Lohan still has the energy to be Madonna's new BFF. Though admittedly the starlet's not thrilled about getting Britney Spears' sloppy seconds. [Scoop]
• Rolling Stone Ronnie Wood has headed off to rehab. How are these guys even alive enough to be addicts? Were they all given new livers at some point in the mid-90s? [Fox411 (2nd item)]
• First daughter Barbara Bush uses Craigslist for job-hunting. Suddenly, we soften. Just a little. [Page Six]

Defamer is committed to bringing together professionals from the entertainment industry who are "working," yet still insecure enough about their place in the local food chain to clarify that said employment is not at a national coffee-retailing concern, and the creative, screwed-up women who might tolerate these and various other "eccentric, funny, Jewish-y issues." Writes an anonymous Craigslist poster who doesn't need to look for dates on Craigslist, OK?:

• Al Gore and Lindsay Lohan are in a "huge feud." "She knows what she did," says Gore. Wait — is he making a funny? Good for him! [Deadline Hollywood]
• There's a polio outbreak in Namibia, killing 7 adults and paralyzing 33 others — and the Times still manages to raise the Shiloh issue, if only to tell you that they've no idea whether or not she's been vaccinated. [NYT]
• The settlement regarding Shock's stolen cover photo is off; shitstorm to resume Monday. [AdAge]
• For the lazy fatty within us all, a list of restaurants within 200 meters of every single subway stop. [Taste of the NY Subway]
• No plans tonight? Staying home alone? Have some lotion, kleenex, and a good imagination? Then maybe you'll find some use for these not-so-hardcore Heather Mills pictures. [Fleshbot]
• Trolling Craigslist's women seeking men section brings surprisingly aggressive results. [Animal]
• Behind every activist working against "wealthy white masters" is a hefty trustfund, presumably from his wealthy white father. [Daily Politics]
• The Sun needs a new city editor. If you're a right-wing journo with pants hicked up to your ribcage, please contact editor Ira Stoll. [NY Press]

As the President of the Colonies said in Battlestar Galactica, if the human race is going to survive after the Googlers Cylons attack, we're gonna have to start making babies. So why does all of Silicon Valley have such a hard time getting it on?

• Anything, anything but calling them "vlogs!" A chat where every line is as good as: "i'm so addicted to video journals, i've got vournal disease" [jaschu's record]

If you're looking to sublet a fab Tribeca pad for the summer, and if you happen to have $3,750 to spend on it each month, have we got the place for you. Allow us to quote from the Craigslist listing:

Defamer is committed to bringing together ambitious, young go-getters comfortable with the idea of trading sexual favors for advancement in the entertainment industry with anonymous, Craigslist-trolling executives too cheap to hire out a pro for a lunchtime blowjob. Prepare to fulfill all of your Tinseltown dreams:

Science mag Nature.com says,

A loyal reader crunches the numbers to prove what we all already knew:

From Craigslist, this morning alone:

[Click to enlarge.]

Spotted on Craigslist today:

Tickets for Radiohead's two June shows at the Madison Square Garden theater went on sale Friday morning at 10 AM and, predictably, sold out about 4 minutes later. Naturally this creates all sorts of opportunities for lucky ticketholders to dangle their spares about Craigslist, resulting in the all-too-typical "I'm lonely and and want a hottie" ticket offer. We expect these to grow more and more perverse as the show dates near:

Susan MacTavish Best pimped her client (and partner in crime), Craigslist CEO Jim Buckmaster, in the original Valleywag Hotties tourney. She must have known she couldn't escape a similar fate this time around, so here she is, in a face-off against Kay Luo. Kay is the Simply Hired marketing director who thought up a promo with Dogster: the Simply Hired dog-friendly workplace search. Who's it gonna be, the lady behind the friendly purple forum or the puppy-loving PR princess?

What better way to celebrate today's announcement of a third season pick-up for Boston Legal, ABC's Emmy-award winning showcase for the scenery-masticating talents of stars William Shatner and James Spader, than by scooping up a chair claimed to have been owned by Spader himself:

Defamer is committed to bringing together those who've spent their lives honing an impressive repertoire of salutations and organizations looking to make a clean break from their recent, customer-hostile pasts. The Roosevelt Hotel, home of infamously exclusive celebrity glory-holes Tropicana Bar and Teddy's, turns to Craiglist's inexhaustible talent pool to officially end the Amanda Scheer Demme Era:

Lots of assistant fun today: Depending on who you ask, today or tomorrow is Secretary/Assistant's Day, during which we take a moment to thank the little people who carry the responsibilities of their overlords upon their hunched backs. We'd like to honor this special time by presenting you all with an exciting career opportunity:

And oh, how the Gays shall celebrate:

The SF Chronicle's Alan Saracevic interviewed Craig Newmark this week about Craigslist. Skip the prelude — "this digital media revolution we're in," "changing landscape" — and the intro — you know Craig's story, right? — and dive into the real conversation. Here's the short version, and here's the half-hour interview.

Spotted by a reader last night: