A Pennsylvania mom whose only crimes were caring too much and allegedly giving an undercover cop money to murder someone sadly will not be enjoying Thanksgiving at home this year.

The season six premiere of Toddlers & Tiaras was chilling in bizarre and unprecedented ways, because I'm pretty sure 9-year-old Hailey had never met the jittery, winking gay man who introduced himself as her father before filming her episode.

Today we learned about a mother who is definitely not a narc. And we learned about a mother who could have probably used a narc. Crazy mama's abound, so it's no wonder that your mother is probably the reason behind your case of the sads.

Being a mother is difficult! But there are a few no-nonsense guidelines that can help, such as: Do not sell your daughter's virginity. Not even for $10,000. Felicia Rae McClure, of Salt Lake City, has — according to police — not followed this guideline.

After 18 years of memorizing math equations while chained to a stake, Sophia Chua-Rubenfeld has escaped the basement cage where "superior Chinese mother" Amy Chua keeps her. Unfortunately, she has Stockholm syndrome. Either that, or her mom isn't that bad.

Amy Chua, author of the Wall Street Journal's much-maligned "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior," did a Q&A about her heinous child-rearing techniques. She swears she isn't that monstrous. Watch the "tiger mother" do her best impression of a harmless kitten.

This weekend, I came across "Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior" by Amy Chua. Since I have a Chinese mother, I assembled my face into a self-righteous smirk and began to read. But—woe is me!—my Chinese mother's a fraud.

A German man was frustrated with the police's inability to stop his 17-year-old daughter from seeing her 57-year-old boyfriend. So he took matters into his own hands, and cut off the boyfriend's balls with a bread knife.

No, seriously. John Mayer songs are great! Have you listened—like, really listened—to "Daughters"? That's a song. But why does John Mayer think it's awesome to give rapey quotes?