The voicemail inbox of America's Randomest Guy is blowing up like crazy today, after word has broken that Britney Spears is dating him. That guy? Yes, your friend Dave. That boring old Dave who we all know and never thought about much until he started dating Britney Spears.

An extreme hoarder in Canada who became pinned down when a large pile of his collected belongings tipped over spent two days trapped in his home until a concerned relative asked police officers to check in on him.

Taylor and Jake flirt their way across New York. A Sports Illustrated model gets in a catfight. Celine Dion's husband describes his wife's numerologically perfect birth. Tuesday gossip is a windswept romance.

If you are dumb smart enough to wait in line for an iPad, then you'll be rewarded with workout videos, totally awesome jokes, and a Ryan Phillipe profile... free! It's time to get those abs ready for the beach! [NYP]

We suggested recently that Men's Health editor Dave Zinczenko, the abberific Max Zorin of magazine editors who at Jon Stewart's magazine-bashing session spouted such gems as "fit is the new rich" and "we worship at the altar of our readers," might just possibly be — when the planets align the right way, from the right angle, in the right light — a tremendous tool.