As he does every Wednesday, Dennis Miller spoke to Bill O'Reilly on tonight's Factor. And as always, Miller talked mad shiz about people—Julian Assange and Jimmy Carter, tonight—while using as many lame puns as humanly possible. Watch inside.

This week, President Obama told Latino voters that they should go to the polls in order to "punish [their] enemies." Republican "enemies," presumably. On tonight's Factor, Bill O'Reilly—and especially Dennis Miller—took issue with Obama's controversial comments. Watch inside.

Lindsay Lohan's new girlfriend used to be an Israeli soldier; Khloe Kardashian vacuums up a snake; Paris hilton is OK. Melissa Etheridge's ex writes sad blog poetry. Your Fourth of July gossip roundup is full of all-American lesbian drama.

WWE hosted its sixth awards show last night in Texas. It was three hours long and hosted by Dennis Miller. He alternated between terrible one-liners and rich diatribes on global warming. Also, shirtless wrestlers at podiums: Very bizarre.

Today is a very special occasion for the Queen Bee of fashion. Vogue's Anna Wintour turns 60 today. Others celebrating on this third day of November: Model Gemma Ward is 22. Roseanne Barr turns 57. Former Massachusetts governor Michael Dukakis is 76. Playwright Terrence McNally is turning 70. Dennis Miller turns 56. Film director Hal Hartley is 50. Theater producer Tom Viertel is 68. Writer Joe Queenan turns 59. Phil Simms, the former Giants quarterback and now TV commentator, is turning 54. Famed AIDS researcher David Ho is 57. Kate Capshaw, the actress and wife of Steven Spielberg, is 56. And '80s action star Dolph Lundgren is 52 today.

G. Gordon Liddy said something reasonable; Brian Stelter paused his tweeting and Dennis Miller surrounded himself with comic-book fans. The Twitterati were trying strange new experiences.

For those wondering what you can expect in the lame duck months before Fox News Channel has an Obama presidency to complain about, wonder no longer. While some are dealing with the loss by going rogue, in this sterling clip from last night's The O'Reilly Factor, Dennis Miller and his friend 'Billy' have a good laugh over liberal women still jealous of Sarah Palin's "non-neurotic" Alaskan sex life. It harkens us back to the glory days of conservative talk radio, when Rush Limbaugh spent most of every day saying incredibly offensive things about Hillary. Click for the video.

Vogue editor Anna Wintour is 59 today. (Condé Nast employees: consider yourselves warned.) Model Gemma Ward is 21. Playwright Terrence McNally is 69. Theater producer Tom Viertel is turning 67. Dennis Miller is 55. Roseanne is 56. Kate Capshaw—actress and wife of Steven Spielberg—is turning 55. Writer Joe Queenan is 58. And former Massachusetts governor (and presidential hopeful) Michael Dukakis is celebrating his 75th birthday today.

On John McCain's last fundraiser jaunt through Hollywood, he attracted a motley crew of the men and women who make up the industry's smallest club: Republicans. Hollywood titans like Wilford Brimley, Craig T. Nelson, and Jon Cryer (who was just gathering information!) all turned out to support the candidate who thinks "celebrity" is a dirty word and has the endorsement roster to prove it. So what glittering surprises did McCain have up his sleeve for last night's McCain/Palin fundraiser across the street from CAA? Let's take a look!

NEW YORK — VCs continue to invest irrationally, Spark Capital partner Dennis Miller said at EconAds yesterday. He said too many VCs invest in "rock star" founders as though they are "a call option on a bright future." Others too quickly buy the hype from hard-selling founders. Too many company's are getting too high valuations, he added.

Blogger Ken Layne discovers a poetry generator that takes words and phrases from websites. His result for Gawker:
Gawker stalker though I slammed the streets
where Loews 42nd St Bernards had just walked
over and husband, Harry Evans]. Also: said,
we have your afternoons with being cool.
[Ed. note� or so terribly sorry Wall Street: bearded and beautiful, She meant ,
she and see the title of
making impossible not thing AT the burning question,
I saw what people
Toby Young socialites mailing
list: [] Encounter with Dennis Miller
in the underground economy, euphoria circa 1993
When you corrections.]
�Anisa, 8 years old, P.
Poetry [KenLayne]

Comedian Dennis Miller on Michael Moore's Oscar speech: "He's going to wake up every day for the rest of his life, and he's going to tell us how he hates everything about this country except his right to hate it. And then we say that we love it and he's going to tell us what naive sheep we are and that he's the true patriot because he hates it and he sees all the problems in it. Yeah, right, Mike. You know something, if my yawn got any bigger they'd have to assign it a hurricane name, okay? Michael Moore simultaneously represents everything I detest in a human being and everything I feel obligated to defend in an American. Quite simply, it is that stupid moron's right to be that utterly, completely wrong."
Take that, you whining oaf [Buzzmachine]