The pair of ranchers whose arson cases sparked the Oregon militiamen’s standoff at a wildlife refuge turned themselves in on Monday and are currently in police custody.

Why isn’t ISIS massacring people in the United States every day? Even after the FBI declared the San Bernardino massacre an “act of terrorism” today, the 14 bodies added to the jihadist column on the murder scoreboard still left Islamic radicals trailing right-wing extremists, 48 to 45.

Michael McCaul, chairman of the House Homeland Security Committee, does not think the deadly attack Friday at a Colorado Springs Planned Parenthood qualifies as terrorism: “I don’t think it would fall under quite the definition of domestic terrorism, although I’ll leave that to the Justice Department to make that determination.”

Last spring, after a ricin-tainted letter was sent to President Obama, the FBI arrested Paul Kevin Curtis, an Elvis impersonator and Prince super-fan from Mississippi, on suspicion of mailing the poison correspondence. But then a week later, charges against Curtis were dropped and soon another Mississippi musician was taken into custody, Tae Kwon Do instructor J. Everett Dutschke, who turned out to be Curtis's bitter rival. In the October issue of GQ, author/writer Wells Tower digs into the feud and the whole thing gets weirder—so so so much weirder.

An incendiary device found along the route of a Martin Luther King Day parade in Spokane, Wash., was "likely capable of inflicting multiple casualties," the FBI said today.

Despite "no credible information to support the allegations," five Arabic translators are currently under investigation for trying to poison Fort Jackson's food, reports Fox News and CBN. UPDATE: Reasons why the story is dubious.