Alisher Usmanov is nicknamed "the hard man of Russia," but he's good at seducing the softies in California's tech community: An investment firm he backs lead a $180 million investment in Zynga, the gaming company that trafficked in scammy ads.

A reader sent in the attached screenshot, showing his fruitless attempt to post our guide to enhancing the privacy of your Facebook account. Apparently Facebook found that content to be "abusive."

Facebook's privacy rollback is especially terrible because it's so hard to reverse. Settings are so bewildering that even CEO Mark Zuckeberg has fiddled his two-to-three times this month. So here's a guide to re-privatizing your profile.

Facebook's privacy pullback isn't just outrageous; it's a landmark turning point for the social network. Facebook has blundered before, but the latest changes are far more calculated. The company has, in short, turned evil.

Even all of your favorite bloggers have taken sweet, sweet Sulzberger severance deals and will no longer be working after 6pm today. Luckily fictional freelancer Betsey Morgenstern was skulking around looking for something to do. She had quite the week!

There's a lot of lying going on in Aaron Sorkin's Facebook movie, and industry insiders love it: The script for The Social Network made this year's Black List, top screenplays as chosen by execs paid to read scripts all day.

The implications of Facebook's recent privacy rollback will likely take months to reveal themselves. But it's already clear they go beyond Mark Zuckerberg's stash of intimate pics; we're already starting to learn new things about Hollywood celebrities.

Facebook's CEO has urged his users to carefully review the new "privacy" settings pushed on them by his social network. He should have taken his own advice: He's apparently locked down his photos since we rifled through them last night.

When not waging the war on Christmas, 30 Rock took some time to throw a few light punches at its network, their social networking site, and Facebook in general. It's a superpoke to the eye.

Facebook controversially forced profile pictures into public and pushed users to share candids with the whole world. So now we're blessed with pics of the social network's young CEO shirtless, romantic, clutching a teddy bear, and looking plastered.

Facebook's new "privacy" settings are even more nefarious than they first appeared: The social network has formally nationalized your friends list, like some Cuban sugar plantation, and published it to people who hate you. You have no choice.

It would seem our conspiracy theory is coming true: Facebook's big push to give you "more control of your information" is actually an initiative to get you to give up control of your information. Step one: Frame greed as concern.

Facebook's 100+ "policy enforcers" look for pictures of exposed nipples, nude women, and putdowns of individuals or an unreleased list of "protected groups," neither of which you're allowed to hate. But you're judged only if ratted out, so "friend" carefully!

By day, Chris Kelly extols the virtues of Facebook, where he serves as chief privacy officer. By night, as candidate for California attorney general, Kelly warns of Facebook's "online predators," and says government must "keep people safe" Neat trick.

A grandmother confronts her grandson after reading an article in the newspaper about sex offenders and Facebook. He secretly records it while desperately screaming, "I'm not a sex offender grandma!"

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg issued an open letter to his 350+ million users; you probably saw it this morning when logging in. Facebook will kill regional networks like "New York." Why? To trick you.

Yes, this actually happened: Dana Hanna, a Maryland computer programmer, whipped out a handheld device (hey-oh!) during his wedding, set his Facebook to "married," and Twittered. Just imagine what he has in store for the honeymoon

Let's just hope this lasts longer than that whole "poking" fad.

When you poke your hot gastroenterologist on Facebook and get no response, don't worry: He's trying to be professional. The UK's largest medical professional organization has warned doctors not to respond to "flirtatious approaches" on social-networking sites.

This cheese-tastic video reminds us a little too much of the "FreeCreditReport.com" jingle, but it channels a pain that all too many of us currently face. Let's face it, facebook is simply not cool anymore.